Slipped up 😔

Hey guys, I’ve been watching porn again and just lost the motivation to stop… Which isn’t great. Feeling rather low as well.

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No one here will be able to do anything for you if you’re not ready to stop.
What are you willing to do to stop using porn? Wishing it to happen and willing it to happen are fleeting states of mind. There’s gotta be action. A program that you can turn to and tools to use when you’re feeling the pull to act out with porn.

Reach out to people here if you need help. There’s a lot of knowledge and resources here to get you started but you’ve got to be the one to do the work.

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Hey @Natelm.

Looks like you’re relatively new here welcome.

I’m also addicted to porn and recognize how hard it is to stop.

Don’t give up. You just started. Now, see what you can learn from this. Do you need more help? Maybe a 12 step group or better controls over your online access? What changes can you apply to your life to help yourself in a better direction?

I look at this for myself with every relapse. It’s not an option for me to keep doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results.

If nothing changes, nothing changes.

Anyway, I’m glad you’re here, and thanks for sharing and reaching out. And let’s be sober today and start the new year out right.

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Thanks for the encouragement. Yeah I agree. I am looking into locking down my laptop better. Day 3 and going strong :+1:t4:

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Do you view porn on your smartphone?I know that Kevin uses some very effective applications that stop him from viewing such sites and in sure that there are similar options available for your laptop. :+1::slightly_smiling_face::slightly_smiling_face::+1:

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@anon13078412 I don’t really watch porn on my phone. The honest truth is the screen is too small. I’m currently using an app called everaccoutnable which let’s accountable partners know if I’m watching or looking at some dodgy on my phone or laptop as well. The problem is if I want to watch it I still can. On my ipad you can block access to sites. @KevinesKay any suggestions? My ipad has an in built parent control function where is blocks apps and sites in safari which has been helpful.

Kevin will tell you what he uses, no matter the addiction we have to use everything at our disposal. :+1::slightly_smiling_face:

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Completely agree @anon13078412 thanks :+1:t4:

Hey Nate,

What about Covenant Eyes? I’ve never used Ever Accountable before, but I had a friend that used it before. I just had a better impression with CE, and it made a huge difference.

I used Covenant eyes about 3/4 years or so ago. The problem was on the android its so easy to get around the software plus it didn’t supervise other aspects on other apps the way Everaccountable does. But they may have updated it since then and I will look into it.

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I know what you mean. Even the screen accountability feature doesn’t detect everything, but it did save my butt a few times already.

I’ve only been using it for a short time. I was using an app blocker called Lock Me Out over most of last year. But then it malfunctioned a month ago, and I chose to act out on my phone when I realized it wasn’t working. That’s when I finally added Covenant Eyes. So now, I’m using 2 app blockers on my phone in addition to CE.

My TV and desktop at home are also locked down and password protected by family members.

For me, I need to stay vigilant to keep my home safe. If there is any place where I need to stay safe in, it’s in my own home. Where there’s a will, there’s a way. I have moments of unclarity often. In these times, I really want to act out so bad. So having unrestricted access to the web is a serious boundary violation for me. In fact, my access to the web is entirely blocked on my phone throughout each day.

If you want further tips regarding an IPhone or IPad, @Bomdhil would be a good resource.

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By the way.

Hi Gareth! We haven’t chatted much lately. It’s always nice to hear from you.

Happy New Year!

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@Natelm what operating system are you using for your laptop? Is it PC, MAC, or LINUX?

And you mate, happy new year! I have been anywhere near as active as I used to be.
I think you will agree that these so blockers are great and will help massively on many occasions but it fits not minimize the effort that needs to be put in, there is no substitute for that. I only know this as I know how bloody hard you have to work on an almost daily basis. It really seems a tough addiction to beat. :+1::slightly_smiling_face:

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I will look into using both. I think raising flags earlier i.e. Unrestricted access to the net is a helpful perspective that I’m gonna start using.

So break down of my gear:

imac
Mac pro
iPad - parents lock through screen time - I can’t download apps 17+ or search certain words on safari

Samsung s9 I use the in built parental controls and can’t download certain apps

All of them have ever accountable on

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Hey Nate, parents can be a good resource while you’re with them. When setting up blockers, as it appears that they’ve done already, using a whitelist approach works very well for myself. I’m too sneaky to benefit from traditional filters. So restricting my web use to the few sites that I’m regularly going to use works very well for me. Sometimes, I may need to ask my family to add a new site to my whitelist, or to temporarily disengage the controls so I can do searches. But for 95% of the time, it’s pretty well locked down. It was a good move for me.

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It’s also super helpful to have a wireless router you can lock down. It’s a central location that blocks porn on all devices that connect to it. Some devices have these features built in. If they don’t, simply change the DNS settings in them to point to a porn blocking service. This is helpful for devices with internet access that can’t have blocking apps installed on them.

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