Yes there some super stressful situations that happened one after another. All separate situations that piled one after another and I just thought a drink or two would give me some temporary relief and I would go back to sobriety but then I just kept drinking.
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I hear this so often, that it will just be a temporary fix and then go back to sobriety. Unfortunately, the inability to control our drinking is never cured and often the downfall is alot faster the 2nd time round.
I’m so glad to hear that you’re aware it needs to stop after 1 week - I spent about 4 years back out there after losing nearly 10 years sobriety. Don’t make my mistake, it has been a hell of a fight to get back to where I am today (3 years).
Whatever you were doing to support your recovery the first time round, maybe go back to those supports. I’m sure you have learnt alot about what does work for you over the past 7 years, time to lean onto those tools again.
Great to have you here and welcome to the forum.
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Well, then you definitely don’t want get back to that type of breakfast. Hey, this week of drinking might be feeling good for you, but you know that honeymoon ends with addicts like us, who can go to dark places with our addiction. Be smart about it, you had a quick relapse after 7 years, you can put down the drinks now and learn from it, or you can try to get back to the breakfast of champions. I’m pretty positive you will choose to put it down, you knew to seek out a sobriety app after a week. That’s a great start, stick around and remain sober. We’re all here for you, and know you can do it.
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Thanks, yes worst breakfast ever! Haha!
That was pure misery. But couldn’t let my family see me with the shakes right? No I do not want to do down that road again
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Here’s what I’ve found to be cunning, baffling, and powerful:
Sometimes there is no ‘trigger’; I just suddenly feel like a drink. There was a gentleman in the local meeting who had 34 years and just decided one day to get a half pint.
And like you, I frequently had vodka for breakfast. Not fun.
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Escalate. Do what you did before to get sober, and then do something additional. Maybe it’s coming here to the forum several times a day. Maybe it’s attending meetings or working a structured program. Maybe it’s adding physical fitness, mediation or prayer.
The idea is to do something more than what you were doing before your relapse. You know what those things were. Now it’s a matter of figuring out what the extra will be, doing it, and absorbing it into your sobriety maintenance.
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Hi Stacey, welcome! My DOC was also vodka, I’m early in my sobriety and I love your mind set of I don’t HAVE to drink, I’m going to use it, thank you. 7 years is amazing, you did the right thing by coming here, tons of support. You got this! 
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Welcome Stacey,
I’m glad you found us.
Every day Gratitude keeps me sober every day.
Come check us out if you’re willing.
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Yes, this!! I am sorry you fell back in and hopefully you have stopped. I don’t know, but it sounds like maybe you got sucked back into the fantasy of what drinking offers you… versus the reality. I know I spent a long long time in the fantasy aspect…thinking that drinking helped me relax, unstress, made me more social or fun…when in reality it made me a shell of a person who hated themselves…I had zero self confidence or self esteem and I let myself down over and over…among lots of other really crappy things and situations.
Maybe really dig into the ‘why’ you are drinking again and the how you can better self care for yourself. Finding healthy ways of caring for our selves during times of stress is so important. A warm bath, a walk around the block, a punching bag, dancing, writing, crying, meetings, etc.
Glad you are here. It’s a good community for support.
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Hi how are you doing?
How are things 
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Still drinking a little. Beer only and only a few a day. My DOC was vodka so I have stayed away from any kind of hard liquor. I will quit again. When I’m ready. I have to get my mind right and then I will be able to. I know things can escalate quickly but I have been moderating successfully so far. Not ideal. Abstinence is so much easier and I’ll get back there.
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Welcome here and sorry to hear you relapsed. You’re here so that’s a start and you didn’t lose all you learned and the support you had before. For me we live life on life terms and there will be good n bad times. I just know for me when the bad times hit n is out of my control or agitating me a pick up the phone,or hit a meeting. Am glad your here and ready to start your journey over it’s truly a blessing bc many don’t get a chance to start over. Am wishing and praying for the best for you on your journey.
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Hi. I just caught this thread. I have been busy.
I relapsed with nine years and ten months. I also thought it would be easy for me to quit again.
I was wrong. It took me eight years of doing all the things we try to make drinking work. It didn’t work.
It just kept getting worse.
One of my biggest obstacle that prevented me from surrendering to sobriety again was not appreciating lesser amounts of time. For example, 30, 60, and 90 days meant shit to me after walking away from close to a decade.
When things got out of hand for me, I tried the classic no hard alcohol rule. I could follow that rule for a while. I could also drink 20 beers, so that rule didn’t do much good for me.
When I drank beer my rules frequently went out the window. All of them.
I would swear to do better. I would maybe quit for a while, but it didnt last long because 30 days meant shit to me.
I had to completely kick the living shit out of myself for eight years before I surrendered. Now the couple of years sobriety that I have means everything to me.
It was really hard for me to surrender again. I hope you don’t have to waste eight years being a drunk like I did.
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It’s already quickly getting out of hand. I drank 12 beers yesterday. I woke up realizing that drinking was actually causing more stress than it was relieving. So for today, I will not drink. Back to one day at a time
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When I decided to try drinking again. I drank a couple of 24oz beers. It went really good.
From that moment, I wanted to make that happen. That’s what I chased.
It didn’t take very long for my drinking to start having negative consequences. All I could see was that nothing bad happened when I drank a couple of beers.
I became focused on trying to keep that.
Looking back, it’s mind boggling how quickly my denial grew in order for me to achieve an unrealistic goal.
My determination to not fail at drinking successfully was stronger than anything.
In Chapter three of the big book it says.
Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death
Thats what I did.
Another barrier that I struggled with was accepting that I didn’t know everything about recovery. My alcoholic thinking discredited everything I learned in my long term sobriety. What I did back then would not get me sober, or keep me sober.
It’s been good to reflect on my milestones in my previous long term recovery and remember how I felt as I cross those milestones again.
I also had to forgive myself for relapsing. That’s been huge!
Be kind to yourself! I’m glad your here!
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Made it through first day. Take 2. I’m not big on counting days and this relapse doesn’t erase my 7 years of sobriety in anyway. I just need to learn from it and move on. And not drink tomorrow.
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Great to hear this and your right the 7 years you did are still your seven years. Glad that you decided to start again sooner rather than later. I’m pretty early on in this journey but come from a long family of alcoholics so I see how it trapped me and has trapped many in my family. Wishing you strength for the road ahead.
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Happy to know you’re back and willing to continue your sober life Congrats on day 2. I found that the first weeks for me were very tough (had quite a few relapses before)
I’m still in my early days (close to 3 months) and think often that I wish I could “control” my drinking, do it in moderation, be “normal”…
Thank you for sharing your story, which shows that even after a very long period of sobriety, I should not think that drinking again is an option.
Two people shared thoughts that I really took to heart:
- “Alcohol is an exhausted resource for me”
- “I’m not drinking today, and I’m probably not drinking tomorrow”
(dear authors of these phrases, thank you a million times over and pardon that I can’t find your names to credit them right now! will try and search, and edit when I have a break)
These two thoughts have helped me tremendously to focus on the fact that right now, alcohol does not benefit/help me in any way, shape or form. It’m not sure if it ever did, but that’s not the most important thing. Now, it doesn’t. focusing on the NOW helps. From now on, I’m a better person without it. My life is better without it. Also, when the nagging thoughts come, focusing only on these 24hours really, really helps. I can take a few deep breaths and make it to my bed at the end of the day without a drink. Will think about tomorrow when the sun rises.
good luck with day 3, and counting
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Thank you. I love this
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