I know this is a sensitive topic folks but let’s all remember to keep it civil, if you find posts difficult please consider letting it go rather than everyone trying to get their two cents in.
Appreciate for those new to the forum these are new conversations, but I think even in a short space of time it is pretty clear that this is a sensitive topic that goes in circles, people have their own views and are unlikely to change them!
We are all entitled to our approaches. Respect and courtesy certainly go both ways.
As has been mentioned before on this thread and elsewhere, it is usually better (more courteous, respectful and powerful) to speak from our own experience rather than making judgements about others. Sometimes this is a fine line, but when others are getting consistently upset it suggests that line is being crossed. Sometimes it is more about tone than content.
Think it’s also worth mentioning that this thread is about getting sober without meetings. There are plenty of 12 step focused threads on the forum and to my knowledge they do not get filled with people saying that people should try not going to AA and doing something else instead. So let’s keep that in mind too.
As a member and as a moderator, I respectfully disagree. No, sobriety does not need to be rainbows and unicorns, but we do need to treat eachother with kindness and respect…even those we may disagree with. The rules of the forum are clear…no name calling…assume good intentions.
We are all here for healing and support. Some of us are raw, perhaps English is a second or third language, perhaps our culture has very differing ideas on sobriety and addiction. The point is, we never know someone’s situation and we can lead with our best selves if we choose. I know personally it can be hard not to react when we feel upset by what someone has written…but for myself, what I tend to learn in that moment is WHY I am having a big reaction and HOW and WHAT can I learn from my reaction.
And back to the original question…Yes, I have had success without AA. I have never attended an AA meeting, so I cannot speak to them. I can speak to my experience getting sober. I will include a link to my story and what has helped me. (I am having some wicked tendonitis right now and cannot type for long, thus the link to an old post).
I will be 5 years sober in a couple of weeks and am feeling very positive and solid in my sobriety.
Maybe there should be a rule about giving off about other peoples way of sobriety , like @StephenUys is doing a lot of damage for people who are maybe thinking of using AA as a way of sobriety
Topic is, sobriety without classes, can we please give people a place to talk about that! If you want to Express the wonderfulness of an organized recovery group…great! I am sure I will enjoy the thread.
longest I’ve ever been sober was without the help of anyone or anything just decided to quit, it was easy and I did with no relapses.
Unfortunately I didn’t realise 18 months later that I wasn’t going to be able to have 1 quick Xmas toast and all hell broke out again.
If you want to quit bad enough you will quit, doesn’t matter what program you do or what experience and advice you are given if your an alcoholic of the kind I am and you want to drink you will drink. AA only helps me now bc I want it to.
When I look at my Uncle, Dad, and Grandfather…at surface level…it really seems that way. My dad, one day walked away from alcohol. What kept him away…my mother. She: 1) gave him an ultimatum, 2) then loved him, 3) helped him change the things in his life that needed changing.
I have never discouraged anyone from anything. I have merely agreed and told people the truth. It has an incredibly high rate of people for whom it doesn’t work and it is a fundamentally Christian set of beliefs. I am also in agreement with the many doctors and professionals who do not believe in the disease model.
If anyone is turned off without first investigating it personally, that is their loss. I know all about it, have lovely friends in it, but just don’t buy 99pct of it.
The most recent study in 2014, found. While acknowledging the difficulty of tracking an anonymous population, a self-reported population revealed that less than 27% stayed sober for one year.
The success rate of those in science based programs is above 44%. Why do I say below in one and above in the other, that is hoe it was in studies. The science based actually goes much higher, but I used the lowest. All study abstracts are available at samhsa.gov. I am not saying to others that one is better than the other. If you are one of either groups great.
sobriety has to be sugar coated rainbows.
