Sobriety without AA

Advice & Questions
23

For the first two weeks I basically logged into a 24/7 Wim AA meeting and I’ve brought the 12 Steps book and some other AA books as well. It’s an essential lifeline for so many people that I want to honour the work that’s been done by AA massively. Saying that, I’m not working an official programme now, I don’t do meetings at the moment. But I do read the books and think deeply about the tenets and structure of the support system, it makes absolute sense.

Go to a meeting, go to lots, hear nuance and interpretation and how steps are received and worked according to need. Everyone is different. So many times I’ve been so surprised to hear someone else’s thoughts on a step or saying or topic. It’s amazing. I will definitely be going straight to meetings if I need to hold someone’s hand and have self care. If I don’t like that meeting then shit happens, stay for the next one… You might like it, you might learn, you might grow.

I’m nearly 3 months sober. I need therapy I know that. I need community and connection. That’s my higher power; honesty and pause to reflect.

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24

I used the beyond sober program when I started my sobriety journey. It helped me in many ways, his goal is not just to help you quick drinking but to also change the way you think and look at life so your not a sober sad person. I think it’s worth a try the program saved my life. Here is a link if you’re interested

https://www.beyondsoberprogram.com/

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25

Thank you brother!

26

Routing for you as well! Thanks my friend!

27

I never tried AA, so I cannot speak to that. I achieved sobriety over a very long period of time thar included many quits and many relapses and many many dark nights of the soul.

Some of what worked for me over the past 5+ years of sobriety (still AMAZING to say 5 + years after 40+ years of drinking and wandering in the wilderness)…

Being active on the following apps…

Talking Sober
Reddit r/stopdrinking
Women for Sobriety (WFS)
Soberistas
She Recovers

Putting myself to bed early and often in the early days…sleep, blessed sleep

Yin yoga, bicycle riding, HIIT fitness classes, hatha yoga, walking, yoga nidra, running, hiking

Meditation and sleep meditations

No wine in house

Journaling

Hot epsom baths or soaking in the hot tub (especially helpful when anxious)

Drinking a LOT of LaCroix, now I drink plain water

Reading and rereading a LOT of sober memoirs/novels

Keeping a list of how I want to live my life/what sobriety offers…I keep it on my phone and when I start thinking, hey, maybe just one glass of wine, I read my list and remember how desperate and unhappy drinking made me.

I owe much to the community support I found here and the ability to jump on here and just read and lose myself when needed…as well as all the information and tips and tricks I learned from others, many of them AA aficionados.

Most importantly in my mind, I never ever stopped quitting. When I would slip back, which I did for YEARS, eventually I would come back to quitting and I think all of this combined gave me stepping stones and tools and baby steps towards building a solid foundation of knowledge and strength.

Whatever works for you…keep doing that and add to it as needed.

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29

This is the way.

The thread is a good time to say, even if you’ve already got something that’s working it doesn’t hurt to add more tools to the belt. In my experience it helps keeps things fresh. Might even lead to something great we’re not expecting.

I’m also learning more about Dharma Recovery just to up my meditation based on what I’ve heard about it here.

As a wise man here likes to say, “Keep getting better at getting better.”

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30

2 years sober with no program.

AA wasn’t for me and I don’t subscribe to some of the key messages or approaches. That’s not to say it doesn’t keep many people sober around the world.

What i can agree on however is that it really helps to have a purpose or passion that keeps you sober. In AA they call it a higher power, but for me it’s simply a dedication to exercise and self improvement. It’s easy to stay sober as a result because i genuinely look forward to waking up early to train and drinking would fuck that up.

I think what it really amounts to is fundamentally changing your opinion of yourself and the beleif about who you are. Alcoholics have horrible self esteem and you need to do things that make you feel like a great human being. That’s not easy and requires being consistently uncomfortable in the beginning.

When you genuinely feel like you are a person worth giving a shit about it’s far easier to make regular choices that will benefit you in the long run. For me that’s all it boils down to.

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