# Solutions Based
**URL:** https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557
**Category:** Feedback
**Created:** [January 3, 2020, 7:54pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557 "2020-01-03T19:54:15Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Englishd](https://talkingsober.com/u/Englishd)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 7:54pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/1 "2020-01-03T19:54:15Z")
I think this deserves it’s own thread. There seems to be a vocal, albeit small population who are dissatisfied with the current state of affairs. Given that this is a community based recovery forum, we should include the community in helping to determine the direction of the forum.
I, for one, am getting frustrated with the seemingly arbitrary issuance of flags and punishments, as well as a perceived double standard. Sure, these are my problems so I should just deal with how I react to them, but I’ve noticed a grown sentiment in other members as well. I’m not doing this to knock any mods. I’ve been here nearly two years and have the utmost respect and admiration for @SassyRocks @C-sun @Steve92 and @NewPerspective.
The point of this thread is to identify areas for potential change and discuss them. First, is there actually a problem that needs addressed, or should I just shut up? Second, is the problem that is something that can be, or should be fixed? Finally, what can we do to fix it?
I’d say a good 90% of what goes on here runs great. It’s the other 10% I’m looking at.
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### Author:  [@SassyRocks](https://talkingsober.com/u/SassyRocks)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 7:56pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/2 "2020-01-03T19:56:12Z")
Let’s be clear in that mods are not the ones throwing flags. It is no one person either.
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### Author:  [@Englishd](https://talkingsober.com/u/Englishd)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 7:57pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/3 "2020-01-03T19:57:17Z")
I believe you when you say it, but I feel like personal agendas may influence decisions to flag in the first place. However there is no real way to prove that. Hence a flag committee.
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### Author:  [@SassyRocks](https://talkingsober.com/u/SassyRocks)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 8:01pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/4 "2020-01-03T20:01:13Z")
In all honesty, I rarely see that. I am not saying that it never happens, but many flags I see are made by people who seem to care and are concerned.
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### Author:  [@Englishd](https://talkingsober.com/u/Englishd)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 8:05pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/5 "2020-01-03T20:05:17Z")
That I am more hesitant to believe. It’s easy to say your are doing something under the banner of being concerned with the forum, while following through on a personal vendetta. For example, my memes that get flagged are often no where near as bad as other memes, yet seemed to get flagged more frequently than other members.
My dicks our for harambe meme is a perfect example. I can go back and find plenty of other sexually suggestive memes from that day that weren’t flagged. So you want me to believe that person was completely neutral whence hitting the flag button?
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### Author:  [@SassyRocks](https://talkingsober.com/u/SassyRocks)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 8:07pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/7 "2020-01-03T20:07:24Z")
I don’t want you to believe anything Derek. I simply stated my impression. I could well be wrong.
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### Author:  [@anon12657779](https://talkingsober.com/u/anon12657779)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 8:11pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/8 "2020-01-03T20:11:39Z")
I’d go with a flagging committee. Maybe rolling so that there is no long term commitment needed but everyone who wants a go can. Then people can get a taste for themselves of what it’s like. Might put a control measure on it if people can see what gets flagged for what and why.
I wouldn’t like to commit myself full time to it. But I’d definitely have a short term go.
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### Author:  [@Englishd](https://talkingsober.com/u/Englishd)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 8:13pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/9 "2020-01-03T20:13:01Z")
I started the thread prior to receiving the news. However, I actually do take offense to the seemingly double standard around some issues. Though I am more spiritual, rather than religious, I have seen God bashing going on for quite sometime around here. How do you think people who follow organized religion feel when reading that? My thread was simply a counter-balance to that. Necessary? Perhaps not, but I believe it spurred some conversation. Tell me. Would you feel the same way if a newcomer had started that thread?
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### Author:  [@Eke](https://talkingsober.com/u/Eke)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 8:15pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/10 "2020-01-03T20:15:57Z")
It’s always fair to ask if we’re caught up in a feedback loop, intentionally or not, from all sides. When they arise they can be toxic.
If there is something that can be done to make it right for everyone, all the better.
Personally, I just don’t take it personally and respect the hell out of all you lot. I’m an insensitive clot that way.
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### Author:  [@VSue](https://talkingsober.com/u/VSue)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 8:20pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/11 "2020-01-03T20:20:49Z")
I don’t understand what is meant by “flagging committee”…it sounds an awful lot like the cool kids having the power to decide what is allowed or not. Sounds way too much like high school which I would really like to leave in my past.
YES flagging the last few days has been ridiculous. A lot of it seems more like “I don’t like you” rather than “you’ve hurt me with what you posted”. But let’s not change how the board works because of a few days. We regularly go through these ups and downs and it all works out.
I do suspect that a few posts (cough cough Derek) were started just to see if people would flag…???
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### Author:  [@Englishd](https://talkingsober.com/u/Englishd)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 8:26pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/12 "2020-01-03T20:26:17Z")
No, my post was started to show the inconsistency of who gets flagged and what topics are deemed inappropriate, but that’s not the point of this thread. The committee would be voted on by forum members to evaluate the validity of threads. It would relieve some of the burden from @SassyRocks that she is currently handling. I think at @VSue as a long term member would be a great person to do the evaluating.
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### Author:  [@Englishd](https://talkingsober.com/u/Englishd)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 8:29pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/14 "2020-01-03T20:29:25Z")
Honestly, I wish you wouldn’t have said that because all it does is give me validation lol. That’s dangerous ground for a drunk like myself.
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### Author:  [@VSue](https://talkingsober.com/u/VSue)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 8:33pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/15 "2020-01-03T20:33:17Z")
That is fair…I’ve learned to know that when you’re being a little bit of a shit disturber you are doing so to point out something. To me it’s like Wierd Al songs…they aren’t to point out that a song sucks…he’s pointing out the absurdity in the popularity of songs. I totally believe you were trying to point out that it’s seems odd to post “no religion please” and no one says anything but if one posts “no atheism please” it’s all flags. BUT you did know it would get flags so you did kinda egg it on. 😜
To be clear…I’m a huge Derek fan…I just need to stay out of the meme threads etc because I know I will occasionally get offended.
And thank you very much for the compliment but for my sanity and my sobriety I HAVE to stay out of this stuff. If I get involved I’ll get invested…and that is a dangerous place for me.
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### Author:  [@aircircle](https://talkingsober.com/u/aircircle)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 8:33pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/16 "2020-01-03T20:33:19Z")
I wonder if it would be helpful for flagging to require an explanation of HOW it breached community standards, not just ticking a box. If it requires someone to put some thought into and articulate what the problem is, and gives the mod more information on the thought process.
There is plenty of BS here that I find offensive and inappropriate, but I only flag when something crosses a line of breaching a community standard, is bullying, abusive, or potentially threatening someone’s sobriety (ie indecent images).
I dislike when people have a go at others flagging, including through name calling and intimidation because it is also encouraged by mods to flag something where there is a problem and let the mod sort it out. So when others complain about people flagging and thinks they should toughen up or lighten up, I think that is problematic. It is a mechanism to request moderator attention, which is totally legitimate and shouldn’t result in people trying to bully the person flagging.
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### Author:  [@SassyRocks](https://talkingsober.com/u/SassyRocks)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 8:36pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/17 "2020-01-03T20:36:11Z")
I might add that bullying moderators is not a good thing to do either.
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### Author:  [@aircircle](https://talkingsober.com/u/aircircle)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 8:37pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/18 "2020-01-03T20:37:54Z")
I think that bullying mods should result in a red card and suspension. I wonder if it would be helpful if @Robin set out some more detail about community standards - ie what standards should be applied when a flag will be upheld or dismissed and what can result in immediate suspension, or how warnings are used, etc.
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### Author:  [@Eke](https://talkingsober.com/u/Eke)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 8:40pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/19 "2020-01-03T20:40:16Z")
> [@aircircle](#):
>
> I wonder if it would be helpful for flagging to require an explanation of HOW it breached community standards, not just ticking a box.
Flagging does require a little bit of thought, though I’ve only used one that I can recall.
How the review works I’d also like to understand better. It seems to me mods should be allowed to dismiss them without penalty upon review, understanding they don’t often do so.
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### Author:  [@SassyRocks](https://talkingsober.com/u/SassyRocks)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 8:42pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/20 "2020-01-03T20:42:25Z")
It would be very helpful to have some concrete guidelines for us to follow. We are all just winging it. There is no moderator manual or guidelines to follow.
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### Author:  [@no-longer-a-victim](https://talkingsober.com/u/no-longer-a-victim)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 8:44pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/21 "2020-01-03T20:44:44Z")
I’ve been a bit surprised how there seems to have been an upsurge in not-so-positive posts the least few days…
Do we need reminding of the guidelines fue the community? Perhaps we all need to read them again…
E. G.
## [Always Be Civil](https://talkingsober.com/faq#be-civil)
Nothing sabotages a healthy conversation like rudeness:
- Be civil. Don’t post anything that a reasonable person would consider offensive, abusive, or hate speech.
- Keep it clean. Don’t post anything obscene or sexually explicit.
- Respect each other. Don’t harass or grief anyone, impersonate people, or expose their private information.
- Respect our forum. Don’t post spam or otherwise vandalize the forum.
These are not concrete terms with precise definitions — avoid even the _appearance_ of any of these things. If you’re unsure, ask yourself how you would feel if your post was featured on the front page of the New York Times.
## This is a public forum, and search engines index these discussions. Keep the language, links, and images safe for family and friends.
Here’s to a healthy healing community where respect and empathy guide our posts.
😊
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### Author:  [@SassyRocks](https://talkingsober.com/u/SassyRocks)
#### Post date: [January 3, 2020, 8:45pm UTC](https://talkingsober.com/t/solutions-based/77557/22 "2020-01-03T20:45:22Z")
I dismiss them often (the function is ca!led ignore). We are able to agree, ignore, disagree. From there we have the choice to hide post, suspend user or silence user. Obviously we are very reluctant to silence or suspend.
It is always appreciated by me when people flagging add in their reason, which happens more frequently, which I truly appreciate.
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