hi friends. i currently live with my older brother, and we get along well (when i’m not being a punk haha). my biggest concern rn is that he still smokes weed regularly. so does my mom and her husband, who i like to visit as often as i can.
weed was the sneaky one for me. i’ve been clean (and so have they) off of “hard” drugs for a couple years now, but i only let go of weed about 3 days ago.
so far so good about not feeling tempted to smoke when i see my family do it, but what if today i’m weak? what about a few months from now? i wanna be DONE, not still lingering or holding onto the smell of weed or how it feels to smoke.
i’m afraid of what yall might suggest, i truly am, but i need help. any suggestions would help, but i’ll let you know now that i’m hesitant to bring my family to a meeting or to move away from them, so i may not LIKE what you have to say (no offense friends!) but that doesn’t mean i don’t NEED to read it!
anywho, thank you if you read this! stay safe, be good to yourself, and i hope you’re well :] <3
Not the same situation but I can relate to how hard it is to be around others who partake. My husband and I drank and drugged together for years. When I got sober, he gave up everything but alcohol. He’s an alcoholic so it was around ALL the time. It wasn’t like I could tell him not to bring it in the house, it’s his home too. I kindly asked him not to put it in my face though. He drank in another room out of my view. I could still smell it and see the effects it had on his demeanor. What helped me was staying close to this forum, AA/NA and long walks. I had to revisit my list of why I got sober very often (I keep it on my phone). Eventually, I got to the point that it didn’t faze me at all.
thank you for sharing your experience my friend! i’ve found in the past that, regardless of time without, i was always inevitably tempted to use again if i knew it was around. i want to be unbothered by it, and right now i don’t feel bothered, but i don’t want to set myself up for failure.
being involved here and in meetings has saved me from myself so far, so i definitely give yall the credit! i’ll have to get off my butt and go for a good walk, as well as make a list of reasons to be and stay sober, thank you for the advice! best of luck on your journey, friend, i hope you’re well <3
My problem was alcohol. Not weed, so IDK if this is helpful. My husband is a heavy drinker and weed smoker to boot, and I had to quit. I needed to quit. Kicking the weed was easy, but alcohol wasn’t. I tried over and over for literally years before I finally was able to quit drinking for good. That was only a little over a year ago, and I still from time to time I have a “WTF, do it just this once” moment. My first 60 days or so I really worked hard to not cave. After that it gradually got easier. Now those moments are just blips I can easily shake off, by reminding myself that I know where “just this once” leads. So take heart, you’re doing the work , so you can live a better, healthier life. Have your plan for what to do when tempted, and stick to that plan with all your might.
we all have the same problem my friend! what we used to drown that problem doesn’t make a difference to me, so your advice is always welcome :] !
thank you for sharing your experience with me, i really appreciate your openness <3 this is my third time trying to get sober, and i’ve learned that i have no defense over using other than talking and listening to my fellows and putting in the work. i don’t trust myself to make a plan and stick to it, bc my might isn’t that strong haha, but i’ll give it a try!
i hope you’re well, my friend, and be good to yourself today ! :] <3
What really helped me (after realizing that alcohol is a poison that has control over me) is what someone on this forum said: “I don’t need to use today”, you can give yourself permission not to be shackled to your DOC. May sound a bit corny but for me the daily struggle was much easier once I went from “I am not allowed to use xxx” to “I don’t need to use xxx”. Hope that helps!
That’s when your higher power is a door knob. Open that door and get out if you find yourself being tempted. My wife drinks every day. Al-Anon has save my life and my marriage. At first I was too focused on my sobriety to care if she drank. It bothers me now. But I’m powerless over people, places and things.
There is nothing wrong with be selfish to protect your sobriety at all cost.
thank you for the advice my friend! i like the changing of “i’m not allowed to” or “i don’t get to” into “i don’t need to.” it makes sense to me, yet at the same time i hear that addict voice in my head going “sure you don’t need to, but don’t you want to?”
my family (also addicts) always said “i don’t need my drugs, i want them,” but i’m trying to challenge that as well! i DON’T want them, not anymore!
thank you again for sharing, friend, i hope you’re well <3
thank you my friend, you both made me laugh and gave some solid advice! love the door knob bit, lol!
you’re so right tho, i gotta stop sitting around at home all the time, especially now that i’m sober and especially when i do feel tempted. it’s hard to think about not being able to be around my family, but i gotta put my sobriety first.
thank you again, my friend, i appreciate ya! best wishes <3
