Hi everyone hope everyone is well. I stayed away from verbally alcoholic husband, he still drinks and trys to get verbally on phone. Then when sober gives me the SOBER SORRY as I call it. For got to mention he is with his father that’s well aware of his addiction and complains about it when he upsets him,but then pops open beers with him as soon as hes not mad anyone. I come to realize his dad is the true enabler and with him allowing it in his home Im fighting a losing battle and need to focus on only me.
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You are not alone. Enabling is a revolving issue discussed, as well as loved ones who are still in addiction. I invite you to read around on this thread and contribute Are you affected by a loved one who’s an addict?
Focus on your own sobriety, everything else is out of your control. Sending you strength 
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Thank you for your advice
Hey guys hope everyone is well update on my alcoholic verbally abusive husband, now he’s claiming to want help. A little background story is I have been a rehab nurse in the past currently RN and he claims that if he can come to where I’m at that I can rehab him. What are your thoughts on this? Any advice would be helpful.
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Hey Vii
Nice to see you back.
First thought.
Alcoholism is a cunning and baffling disease and he could be manipulating you. Sounds like he’s putting pressure on you to rehab him. His recovery is not your responsibility. I obviously don’t have any facts whatsoever. But that is my first thought.
If you do help him out in this way having some clear cut boundaries in place would be a good idea. I try like hell to make sure boundaries I put in place are ones I can enforce. I’m still a work in progress on that one.
I wish you well.
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It’s good that he wants help. He should get it not at your facility. There are many reasons why it’s said where I live that you never should treat your own family. First of all the professional distance is not existent. Second, you are biased by personal knowledge, experience and emotions. Third, manipulation can occur easily because of 2. on the patient’s side.
I personally always made clear that I care and support but will not be involved whatever medical / health treatment took place.
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Thanks so much yes I have set boundaries and I would have back up with doctors since I have connections from being a RN. We’ll see if he follows through but at the same time I will not hold my breath. As always great advice 
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Yes I agree with you I would have back up from doctors I would just administer the meds for detox since I’m a RN nurse. He would actually have a harder time with me because he can’t manipulate me anymore, and honestly he never could before I was in denial before. I’ve been on three way calls with him and therapist and literally heard how easily he made them think he was ok, why could he do it to a therapist that has years of experience… Because they don’t know him. That is a advantage at this point that I have he can’t manipulate me anymore because he knows it won’t work because I know him. Thanks for your advice always helps me a great deal coming here you guys in this group deserve all the blessings in the world for helping people like me. I will not hold my breath and will not put a hold on my life for him and he knows it. So he either takes the help with myself and doctors or he can continue letting addiction control his life. I know from my own sobriety journey you can’t make anyone do anything until they are ready but if he doesn’t take steps I’m stepping away permanently 
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