Last year at this time my mom was in the middle of chemo for stage 4 ovarian cancer. She has been in remission for the last 7 months. On Tuesday she was admitted to the hospital, and 2 hrs ago I just found out it is back and terminal. My employer is amazing, she is a huge reason for me getting sober. She is pressuring me to go home now and see my mom, but I am in the middle of moving next week, and to be honest, work keeps me grounded. I am hanging on to my sobriety by my fingernails. The more out of control I feel, the more I want to drink. I have an amazing sponsor who is in constant contact with me, so that is a positive. I just needed to vent 
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Im so sorry to hear this. 
Thinking of you. Go see her if you can and soon. Hugs
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Thatās so sad. Thinking of you x
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Well thatās very bad news. You want to escape from this, I know, but hold tight to your sobriety. There isnāt a drug in this world that can make You feel better at a time like this. Be with your mom if you can, hold her tight and be present with her. You wonāt want any more regrets to remember when you think of this time in your lifeā¦ā
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I am so sorry you have this burden to bear, right now. Losing my Ma was what I used as my excuse to relapse for 11 months. Itās a blessing to have a supportive employer and others who can stand beside you in the storm.
This is 100% up to you, as I feel how we face grief and impending loss is very much an individual thing, and I donāt know what your relationship with your Mom is, so take this for what its worth: Cherish these last days with her. You canāt get them back. When I was crawling into a bottle of Red, bottle of White, it was as much because of the fact that when I left home to serve in the Marines, I avoided going home, and when I was home, I kept the visits with my Ma to the shortest minimum I could. Even after I got out, I still held to the same practiceā¦and after she was gone, I regretted this. It was guilt as much as grief, that I sought relief from.
Again, I donāt know a thing about your relationship. Just passing along what I went through. Iām just sorry you are going to have to face this loss, and pray that you handle it better than I did.
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My mom is actually my best friend. And when she was going through chemo this time last year, I was drinking the entire time 
These are difficult times and i feel for you. Sobriety will be helpful at this time.
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Then thereās not a moment to waste then, drinking.
Not nearly on the same level, but I believe the sentiment is the same. What made me really sit up and take a hard look at myself, was so simple, and yet so powerful. My good wife looked at me one morning and said āYou know, your little girl hugs you every night before she goes to bed. She says āI love you daddyā. You donāt know that, because you are passed out. I know you miss your mom, and you feel guilty about the times you didnāt spend with her, because it was a painful reminder of how her alcoholism and mental illness affected your childhood. How many hugs do you have left in your life, from your little girl?ā
I am a hard man, emotionally. Some would call me stoic. I wept at the thought of this. Hell, Iām getting a tear right now, just typing this. How many hugs do you have left? I donāt know, but Iām not going to miss a single one of them.
Praying for you.
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I am so, so sorry to read this news. I drank my way though my husbandās treatment for stage IV colon cancer. I totally understand wanting to drink when life feels out of control. Please keep checking in here and venting. I have to believe that sadness and anger are better than artificial numbness. Thinking of youā¦
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