Hey we moved your other thread, you should head back over to it.
Well, I relapsed over the duration my trip, luckily without any notable incidents. Day 6 now, dealing with cravings for escapism, but somehow stronger in my will. Husband asked about getting alcohol and I was firm in saying no.
I’m struggling with being his caretaker. He isn’t sleeping at all due to perscription amphetamines, which has led to all kinds of destructive side-effects, and he shows no signs of wanting to change or take care of himself. He totalled his car while I was gone, suffered a head injury, and I’m trying my best to take care of him. It’s more than I can handle alone. I’m living in fear of our finances, what he’ll break next out of sleep deprivation, and I’m desperately trying to maintain some kind of order in the house.
Still need to go to a meeting. Honestly, I’m afraid to leave him unattended right now, and there is nobody I could ask to watch him nearby. Right now, I think I’d break down into tears the second I walked through the door.
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Hang in there, SuberAlles. Hopefully, with God’s grace, all will be well soon.
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Is your partner aware of your journey with sobriety? If not it may be helpful to have a conversation as a supportive partner is only going to be helpful. If he is aware and still offering you alcohol then that is a toxic situation and needs to be addressed in whatever way will protect the your sobriety.
Love doesn’t hurt, remember that. People who love you should want to see you happy and healthy.
All the best in your journey, you have the strength to overcome your challenges.
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This is dangerous to your sobriety, I really think another conversation is in order, perhaps some sort of counselling to really get to the root of things.
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He is aware, and has been (inconsistently) supportive of my sobriety in the past. He enables more now because he is struggling deeply himself, though in total denial of any problem. There have been several steps back over the last months with changes in finances and insurance, but we both agreed we needed counseling and… then life fell apart but I’m still going to try. Thank you for you response
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The best part of that is when you said “i am still going to try.” I know personally that subtle sentence you just said is what i needed this AM.
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Best of luck with everything, you got this!
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If you can’t make the meeting, can the meeting make it to you? There are the online meetings on in the rooms, online intergroup https://www.aa-intergroup.org or idk where you are but reach out to intergroup or other organization in your area. They maybe able to set you up with meetings by phone or put you in touch with other alcoholics. They may even be able to arrange someone to visit you.
Remember the first AA meeting was just one drunk talking openly and honestly to another drunk.
Just some thoughts.
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Thank you, that’s very helpful.
Just made day 7 and open the freezer to find my husband’s new rum bottle. Asked him to hide it since it triggers my cravings, asked about his own goals of not drinking, and he did agree to attend a meeting with me. Thinking NA may be a better option for him, but AA would be a good start.
I’m strong in verbally saying no, but my brain won’t stop thinking about that stupid bottle. Writing it here helps. I’m trying not to be angry at his destructive and enabling habits, be strong for myself, and support him however I can.
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Look, nothing can happen if you are not around. IF NOBODY ELSE CARES ABIUY THIS SITUATION WITH YOU, I DO!!!
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Thank you.
Happy to share that he has been sober for about a month (not sure on the exact date.)
I’m on day 14 and it hasn’t been easy, but I’m grateful for every day I choose sobriety.
We still have plenty of work to do as a couple… At least he isn’t enabling me lately. ODAAT
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I highly suggest using the Smart Recovery tools for overcoming urges and irrational beliefs. There are online voice and chat room styke meeting several times a day. Often times people are more honest when not face to face with someone and people really open up. Also hearing the stories of success can be a very helpful experience.
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What a great story. Hope things stay positive for you guys 