For those of you with younger kids (mine are 6 &7) - How do you talk about your recovery with them? How much do you share? Do you share?
My kids basically know “momma doesn’t drink anymore”. They only saw me really drunk a handful of times as I always drank after they slept. But they did witness a few fights I had with my husband (verbal) etc. I have told them I dont drink anymore, but I would like them to understand it has taken a lot of work so hopefully they dont make the same dumb choices I did. I also want to teach them its OK to let go of problems in their own way. One day at a time early years edition. I haven’t told them about AA but I might say something along the lines of I go to a class every week to learn about why Alcohol is bad …something they can relate to.
Any tips from parents who have been this route are welcome. I really have no idea. 
I’m wondering the same thing. My daughter is 5 so a little young yet.
But drugs are getting worse out there. I’ve never had a problem with alcohol cant stand the taste.
But I want my daughter to be informed.
Maybe when shes older share my experiences with her. I just dont want her to think I’m a piece of shit. But once I get years under my belt I can show her it can be conquered, but is a lifelong battle.
Looking for answers too.
Oh forgot to mention right now my daughter says daddy is fixing his thinking, hes working on his head. And goes to a meeting everyday.
That’s the extent of what she knows…
Although shes seen me OD more than 3 times so I think she knows more than I think…
Not sure how to talk with her.
My girls are only 2 and 4, and this is stuff I do think about alot. I want to be prepared when they are old enough to experience alcohol. I’ve been reading alot, and one thing I’m seeing is I can’t tell them they are not aloud to ever drink, bc just like me that is only going to make them want to do it more. So as they are growing up I just want to properly educate them on it so that they know the harms, and explain to them what it did to daddies life. So that hopefully they won’t want to experience it. Hopefully by the time they are old enough, the way alcohol is portrayed today won’t be the same. Advertising today make u think drinking will make you cool and funny, but they don’t show what alcohol really does, and all the nights you can’t remember.
My kids are 11 and 13. They know why my wife and I attend couples therapy, but I have never explained my group meetings and personal therapy beyond the scope that it is for emotional help.
My addiction is porn and masterbation, so I don’t know if it’s ever a topic I’d discuss outside of a direct question.
My kids are now 15 and 17. I have been drinking throughout their entire lives. If your kids aren’t aware that you have an issue with alcohol, I wouldn’t even bother discussing it at this age.
In broad terms about alcohol use, if it comes up, absolutely discuss it in an age appropriate way. I don’t think at their age they need to know about your AA meetings other than, “I go to a place that helps me be a better mommy and person”. They may not understand the concept of needing help not to drink. Depending on how you’ve talked to them about it, it can strike fear in them if they see other people drink alcohol, if they’ve learned it is “bad.”
Zach’s “Daddy is fixing his thinking” is another good way for a young child to process what you are up to.
Just let them lead the convo. It’s entirely possible they are completely oblivious to the fact that you are even seeking help. I didn’t drink for 30 days and my teens didn’t even notice 
, because I don’t generally get “drunk”, just numb.
My kids are 10, 18 and 19. The older ones know the gritty details of my addiction and were there when Inwas at my lowest. I share with them everything and am open and honest. I hope that they could live vicariously through me so they wont even attempt going down that road. So far so good, they are good kids and claim to not have ever drank. But then again, I used to say that when I was their age.
Anyways, my 10 year old knows I quit drinking and knows I used to drink a lot. I’m not sure he understands addiction just yet. But regardless, I’m still open and honest. I guess that’s all you can be.
My daughter is 5 and has mentioned she noticed we dont go to the ‘drink’ store anymore. I’m not sure she ever made the connection to the way I behaved bc of it. I know she saw me at my worst some nights and even putting her to bed blacked out and in the morning she’d bring up something I said we were gonna do that day that I never remembered saying. Ugh. And her seeing the way I treated my bf and the fights we had in front of her. Those were the reasons I left her father so she didnt have to witness that and then I ended up being just as bad as he was. I’m just so glad shes still young and can now just see the positive changes in mommy who doesn’t sleep all the time. She doesn’t understand why I go to meetings some nights when I could be spending time with her, but I tell her I joined a special club to make new friends and keep me happy. Shes sad its adults only, lol. Anyway, I know one day she’ll be told the truth of what I was(probably by her father and his family) and that’s when I’ll explain it. I pray she doesn’t turn out like me
My daughter is 16 and she lived thru my addiction with me she didn’t see all the drugs and use but she knew it was going on behind closed doors my soon is too young to have been overly affected by it ,I don’t think at young ages like 5/6/7 you need to be working to much unless it was in your child face the entire time
My son was 2.5 years old when I was at my low.
He said Dad “ew” in the Dutch baby version.
I am sure he knows what my using did with my state… I believe kids feel all energy.
What I did when I first quit I wrote him a letter for when he will ask me the questions he has every right to.
@ThajokerNL Mario, I agree I think kids no more than we give them credit for. I like the letter idea. That is beautiful.
Thanks for sharing you story. I too am grateful for making changes while they are little. I am sure they connect alchohol to me fighting with their dad because he would often yell at me for being drunk… I like Mario’s letter idea. I am going to think on that. I know what you mean about meetings… I am doing an evening skype meeting now and already feel mom guilt that it means they have to entertain themselves for an hour. But I try to remind myself its important for them to have a sober mom.
You are strong. We can do this one day at a time.
@Dejavu Dan I think honesty is the way to go. I think you did good. 
@CapriciousCapricorn wow. First. Good for you Mama! Thanks for sharing. Your girl is lucky. I agree, I want to treat addiction with compassion and not intolerance. If my kids are anything like me telling them not to do something will only make them curious. So I want to be honest and also come from place of compassion. Thanks for sharing your journey. Well done. Sending a virtual hug.
@anon60334405 Mike good on you for thinking forward. Keeps pick up on energy as @ThajokerNL said… so never really to early to think about it.
Mine are 6 and 10, so similar ages. They saw me tipsy plenty, and drunk a fair amount. I could never hide it. When still trying to stop, I would talk about it was hard for me to not drink, but I was trying hard, I wanted to be a better mummy. Now I have talked about how I can’t have one drink like daddy, I have to have none. I haven’t talked about how it was hard, that might be something to mention, it is important.
@Misokatsu yes … same for me… their Daddy can have 1…Mommy cant. My myself I think sharing how hard it is/was is important.
Another kid at nursery school was saying her mum drinks, my daughter was full of pride ‘MY mummy doesn’t drink AT ALL’ (only the last two months, but the vote of confidence was amazing!)