Hello… I am new to this community and very skeptical. I figured I’d give this a go and see where it gets me. So my story huh… I was an abused child mentally, physically, sexually. My parents were addicts and I grew up in an addicts home. My mother a raging alcoholic and my father was more into smoking crystal meth. My mom use to beat the shit out of me when she was drunk. I took it though so that my little sister wouldn’t get touched. Then mom died. She was killed by a drunk driver when I was 15. Her best friend was driving drunk and she survived, my sister survived, but my mother did not. I went into a downhill spiral after the accident. I did every drug in front of me. I drank every bottle and beer I could. I tried to numb every part of me so I didn’t have to think of the loss. I did this until I was 24. I woke up and packed my stuff and moved across country to get away from everything. I felt like I was able to start over again. Be someone new. Life was so good for about 3 months. I mean I was even connecting with my father. Talking everyday to him and seeing how he was doing. Most the time he called me!! Then 3 months goes by and I get that phone call… a call I never thought I’d ever get. My father was murdered. I died inside. I never felt so hallow inside. I started to drink again. I got in trouble with the law. I gained weight. I totally lost myself. This was three years ago and I’m still trying to pick up the pieces. I have the hardest time trying to find the good in things in life. I have a good life. I own my house, my car, I have a wonderful supportive boyfriend. But why can’t I just be happy? … day 3 no drinking… and it’s been a major struggle. And to be honest this felt good… letting this out…
I know that if I knew you lived next door I’d have you over for tea.
The windshield is so much bigger than the rear view mirror for a reason…it’s where you’re going that matters.
Puts kettle on
You’re normal and loved and beautiful and you did what you had to do then and you’ll do what you have to do now. You’re here for a reason…in life and on this forum. Believe that you are not your past.
Last time I checked you don’t get do-over anyway.
My father used to molest my brother and at the time I was 6 so what could I do? What could I have done? They didn’t even drink/do drugs to excuse their behavior. What’s wrong or right?
Forgiving them makes them obsolete. Hate makes them important.
Choose your love wisely.
Shed your skin.
Thank you for sharing your story @Chelso, welcome to this forum. Im sorry to hear about your losses in life. So sad . You deserve to be happy, you can not change the past . Its a Great thing you have a good supportive boyfriend.i do hope you find this forum to be helpful and supportive. Its a awesome forum great, kind People. Its a good place to vent . I wish you the best, also wish u a good day. Stay strong and be good to yourself
I’m so sorry for what you have been through. One day at a time! This forum is full of wonderful people who do nothing but uplift, encourage, and catch each other when we fall. I hope you find peace and a life of happiness and sobriety!
Welcome to the community @Chelso. You have been through a lot but the others are right, keep looking ahead and you will make it through the dark. There is a light at the end of this long tunnel. You won’t get there by turning around, you have to keep walking ahead and never lose hope. God Bless.