Agree. Carry the twisted logic further, and drinking/using is part of recovery.
Yes, it is “part”. It’s the origin part. That’s like saying injury is part of recovery. How about we just not injure ourselves?
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This is a great thread. Relapse doesn’t have to be part of someone’s story. I take my recovery very seriously. If I relapse I seriously doubt that I would ever make it back.
Thank you 
that’s my goal! 83 days today 
️
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That’s some good sermon there. Bravo!
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Everyone is different and entitled to do and see things differently. There is not one way of doing things.
If relapsers cause you such upset
,it might help to refocus on your self and avoid them 
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Thank you. You said exactly what I was thinking
Don’t worry, I will refrain from sharing my views bc they are different for yours. Thanks for adding your insight and knowledge.
I laid down my opinions that is personal to me and seems from the almighty God believing members, that I am squashed from expressing my freedom of opinion and speech, people’s opinions will vary and I am not sorry in the slightest of my views, this is ridiculous to have such a spatter in such a public way. The forum guidelines say that we should respect our other members beliefs and opinions without chastisement or ridicule, this should be a place to embrace our diffences, if I therefore have offended you with my diffences of opinions I will appolagise, not tell you to look elsewhere.
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No one asked you to refrain from sharing your view.
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Same, I was literally peeing blood and my kidneys were shutting down when I quit. If I didn’t get sober for good I would have died way before I ever got liver cirrhosis. Not being dead is my entire motivation for staying gloriously sober.
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This! Yes, This! You get a big “Huuuzzaahh” from me on this.
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I love your term “sober curious.” I knew I was in a bad place - and was paralyzed to do anything about it. That is exactly where I was when I found this app. I read and read and read…some life happened…and three days later I reset and was ready to admit that I was an alcoholic and needed help.
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Odds are that if you are here with some solid time under your belt then you hit bottom before you started. Most of us had too in order to quit drinking completely. It had to become so friggin bad for us that we had no other choice than to quit. It had to become either we continue to drink or we lose everything and eventually die.
We had to try every single possible way to still drink successfully. And we had to see alcohol win every, single, time for us to get here.
For most, Solid recovery really is the last house on the block. Is everyone there? Nope. Not yet at least. But if they continue to drink they will eventually get there. Other than recovery, There’s no happy endings for an alcoholic. It’s that black and white.
So my thoughts on relapse is just that. If they aren’t there yet then they need to go out and get there. I can’t help them get there. Only they can. I won’t comment on the constant relapser post because there’s nothing I can do for them. Not yet at least. But eventually that might change. Eventually they may see that there is no easier, softer way. Just like we had to see that.
But if you want what I have and are willing to go to ANY length to get it, then I might have some help to offer. So All I really have for the constant relapser is a question. Are you done?? Cuz if you aren’t then go and get done. Only then can I help you. I hope you make it back. I really do
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What is interesting is that i thought that I was at that house before. Seems that house is yet further on. OMW
I thought I was there once or twice too😉
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True and sound. True and sound. All ahead full. Steady as she goes.
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I agree with this too and love that term sober curious! I had no idea until I arrived here what I was truly battling and the full scope of it.
I loved @SmokeyMirror’s rock bottom explanation but I’ll probably butcher it: it’s basically when your life is going downhill faster than you can lower your standards.
This was so it for me! My rock bottom was not insanely low comparatively, but I was not up my standard of living, that’s for sure!! Once I got here and truly decided to quit, I never looked back.
I loved your post @anon34614660, thanks for sharing! I always think too of Sassyrocks perspective and how it took her many times to get it right. In the end, it is truly up to us to get and stay sober. There is always a time and place for tough love and truth but I feel that love is always needed. That’s just me and how I live in my real life, that’s how I am on here too. It’s possible to help others think about things differently without totally bashing them down, especially if they are already down because of a relapse. We all are who we are and have our own ways of reaching out for the greater good of trying to help someone see the light. That’s the beautiful thing about life and us being all different, the receiving person will take what they can use from each of us. If it happens to help, it’s worth the effort to me! Keep reaching out for the hands that need it as you feel called to do so. You never know how you can impact people with what you’re thinking!
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Think about one thing – would you walk up to someone you really don’t know at a meeting or IRL and say the same thing in the same way you do here?
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I see what you’re saying, but I also don’t think anyone is saying the habitual relapser is a piece of shit. I think it’s more frustration with the constant relapser that’s not doing anything different: hanging out with users, going to bars, putting themselves around their drug of choice… Constantly.
We all know the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. So when people who use tough love as a motivator see this, they’re going to point it out.
This might be something you’re dealing with, relapsing, but this thread might not necessarily be geared towards you personally. There’s lots of examples on social media where someone of a certain gender or race might unfairly feel singled out by a movement, but that doesn’t mean it’s not a problem.
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You have got it right there
I also don’t think anyone is saying the habitual relapser is a piece of shit. I think it’s more frustration with the constant relapser that’s not doing anything different: hanging out with users, going to bars, putting themselves around their drug of choice… Constantly.
This has definitely been a provoking topic, I don’t think it’s ment in any way to make members feel like they won’t get help from the community and that they are thought of as any less than the veterans of sobriety, I purely expressed how it felt for me, jeeze I fell into the repeat relapser myself at some point
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