Trip to Costco today.
Get done, head to the truck, put the kids a d groceries in.
Husband spots a woman, goes straight to sed woman, hugs her and proceeds to start in engaged conversation (whilst I’m standing next to him)
They say their goodbyes, hug again.
Says nothing to me about who this person was, just continues about what he was doing with no obvious intent on shedding any light on the situation. So I say (a little miffed) "thanks for the introduction. "
“Oh sorry”
Me: “well who was that?”
Him: "an ex girlfriend. "
Triggered.
My mind: 'FU i want to drink and not deal with this. ’
My emotions… hurt, I felt disrespected and disregarded.
The drinking trigger has passed, just needed to write it out of me. Thanks, love you all
31 Likes
Ugh, jerk move mister man, jerk move.
3 Likes
Oh gosh, not a great move by your husband!! You on the other hand are awesome for not succumbing to drink. Good work 
3 Likes
it really drives me crazy when people are so oblivious to their actions, it’s sometimes almost worse than the act it’s self!
2 Likes
Agreed! It could have been SUCH a different situation… ugh
2 Likes
Way to go to not drink! It’s not worth it. I’d give a guys perspective but basically we’re idiots at least I am with woman and my perspective with woman sucks anyways lol. Regardless of any perspective your feelings are valid and hurt by his actions, however big or small there your feelings. Sorry to hear about the situation and your feeling of being disrespected and disregarded but great that you overcame it!
6 Likes
Wow that was pretty tactless. Even from a man’s perspective here, that’s just straight dumb.
It’s nothing to drink over, it’s for sure something that a healthy conversation could benefit from.
If it’s still got you irked, I’d get it out. That’s an unnecessary resentment, and them bad boys have a tendency to hurt the resenter far more than the resentee.
13 Likes
Yeah way to go on not drinking. I am very sorry to hear about the situation.
1 Like
Well done fighting off a drink, heres a thought, maybe because they saw each other he felt an obligation to say hello and avoided an introduction to protect you from such feelings or perhaps he was a bit concerned about how an intro may have played out during but especially afterword. He may have thought he was doing the right thing and protecting you from any negative emotions. I however agree that an introduction was on order to perhaps encourage an open discussion (if warrented) between the 2 of you. I totally get the what if’s but communication is everything in a marriage…yes I know, from both directions. Just a thought, you may feel free to tell me to pipe down as I’m just a guy…
4 Likes
Thank you everyone for the perspectives 
I took some time to really feel out my feelings, then tried to talk to hubby about it. He apologized for my feelings but not for his actions… but I get that apologies arent everyone’s strong suit…
So I’m still feeling grumpy. Still feeling like acting out in some way shape or form. So im processing where those feelings are coming from and why my mind wants to go there.
Meh.
3 Likes
Hey some men like your husband and myself can be idiots at times. He probably just got weirded out seeing her, and was trying to make everything quick, and not try to introduce anyone to avoid making it awkward for you. Those are just awkward situations to begin with lol
5 Likes
You did great as moments like that were my triggers. You are amazing
2 Likes
The more sober time under my belt, along with a lot of personal work, has allowed me time between trigger and action to really address the situation differently… choosing to work through the emotions and find their roots and then grow from those realizations. It’s hard work, but it feels great to come out the other side making better conscious choices
6 Likes
I wonder how it would have worked if the situation was reversed? Well done by keeping calm!
2 Likes
Great job on coming here to vent and work through it! I know I would’ve felt the same way if my husband did that.
1 Like
my friend. I know I would struggle with that kind of situation. Sobriety has brought all my feelings right to the fore, which includes a lot of insecurity. Well flipping done for venting here about it and for being aware of and being present for those feelings! Sobriety for me is so much about letting myself feeling unpleasant feelings, rather than avoiding, dulling, drowning them. You are awesome 