Truth and tough love


#1093

Clean and sober from facebook and other social media except this board and LinkedIn since Sept 2018, 6 months and I think I’ll go for a whole year! The withdrawal sucked the first two months but so glad I stuck it out- just a little less drama and addictive behavior and a little more peace of mind is well worth it today!


#1094


#1095

The three most dangerous words I’ve ever spoken.


#1096

I’ve been to rehab five times…twice for the month…twice for relapsing and doing a two week intervention and once for staying sober for half a year and getting a week of interval rehab…I have seen many people leave rehab…the ones who have no fear in them and think they got it after a month in rehab…will almost certainly be the ones who relapse…but then the relapse rate as it stands is something like 80 %
The ones that I have seen make a success story after rehab are the ones who are so afraid of doing this on their own that they grab a firm hold of a helping hand and attend meetings…have a humble attitude and are willing to do what ever it takes…even if it’s not their favorite thing in the world…
Just my experience.


#1097

Oh my, I LOVE THIS POST! I’ve had a love/hate relationship with social media for a long time! I finally cut the cord and got rid of Facebook. That was the biggie for me. It literally gave me anxiety! I still use snap and IG occasionally but it’s not the first thing I look at on my phone and I very rarely go on them anymore. In my opinion, people are so ADDICTED to technology and social media. I try to stay away from it nowadays. I’ll tell ya what, I get a whole lot more done with my time! Also, I don’t want to spend my whole life looking down at my phone. This app is my exception as I use it for accountability and support :blush:


#1098

I definitely have been afraid a few times the last week! Just wanted to be home in the cover of my house,!.. Aswell as turning down an offer of going out Saturday night (didn’t feel like I missed out at all and turned that down last Thursday ) another spanner was thrown in the works… (Higher power tests?) a friend showed up at my work who I hadn’t seen for near on a year down to drunken rows and other things… Sadly this friend did not look well, and staggered a little when speaking to me, heart was beating hard and I had to say sorry mate I have a client I gotta go back in, I finish at 5 we’ll speak then okay?.. Anyhow they never showed at 5 and I went home :house_with_garden:… Was thinking most of afternoon where shall we go to talk? I don’t wanna go to a pub… Fuck shit fuck etc! Feel bad that I couldn’t do the helping another alcoholic yesterday but it was too hard and that friend used to be my best friend. Best. :cry:. I am sure i will see again. It was a major sign how they looked and where I was. And where I am… The universe/God will throw a few signposts in the road… What a week. Honestly. :pray::rainbow::scream:


#1099

@hazy Thanks for sharing. I haven’t reached the point of having contact with anyone else (except my bike riding buddies and they do/did not know of my issue). I managed to shed everyone else in my life since even the drunks I knew thought I was F’d up. They thought I was a lost soul and finally dropped me off to wither. I am not sure what will happen once I start seeing people again as I venture out more. I am in no frame of mind to go to the places I used to go, and I am purposely choosing other places that I never went to (coffee shops, restaurants, etc.) I cooked at home tonight b/c a lot of folks I used to run with are normally out on Sundays. I am glad you were able to handle this situation; it sounded stressful. It makes me think I need to pre-plan to make sure I don’t find myself on the defensive when this finally occurs. You did the right thing and cannot help someone else until you have finished helping yourself (big enough task). I think you are around the 17 day mark, so stay smart, stay strong, and make sure you keep fighting. :brain: :muscle:


#1100

Thank you :pray::rainbow:


#1101

There’s no rule that states that people, places and things that were once part of our lives, must remain part of our lives.

I don’t maintain contact with anyone I grew up with, really, except one I occasionally exchange texts with, and my family. I have friends from my service days, but I rarely get together with them. I have a friend I met through work, and one I met through Martial Arts, and a couple I used to hike with. I don’t have party buddies.

It’s OK to put people from our past, in our past, and focus on our present and future. We don’t have an obligation to relive “old times”.

It’s called “personal growth and maturity”.


#1102

It’s ok to put people from our past in our past - resonating a lot with me today. Thanks yoda.


#1103

Wow. So, so true. It’s heartbreaking to see people’s faces in their phones all the time especially when young children are present and being ignored. That in itself is so damaging to the kids.


#1104

Thank you :rainbow:


#1105

Definitely addictive. So sad just to see the top of everyone’s head nowadays vs. their eyes :cry:


#1106

Guess what!?! I’m having beer and wine at my wedding.

You know why? Bc I’m the alcoholic and not everyone else. People are allowed to drink and have fun. Despite many people’s insistence, alcohol is not evil, or the devil. It is for people like me, but alcohol wasn’t the problem. My alcoholism is.

Guess why I’m not worried. Bc I go to meetings and work a program every day. I work 10-11-12 to the best of my willingness. You like them 9th step promises? Those 10th step promises is where the real miracle is.


#1107

I’m still legitimately impressed at the bizzaro reasons people come up with that they say make them drink. Listen we are alcoholics. Drinking is what we do. Don’t be embarrassed that you feel like drinking. We all feel that way occasionally. What is embarrassing are the reasons we come up with.

My personal favorite: Meetings make me drink.

What’s your favorite?


#1108

Always made me chuckle. Like we need an excuse to get drunk.


#1109

Really the implication that anything, xyz, can make you drink/use.

How you react to the outside world and external forces is up to YOU. There are a million ways to deal with whatever “makes you” drink. You can do anything BUT drink.

Nobody is holding you down pouring booze in your mouth. Drinking, as with any action, is a choice.


#1110


#1111

Or worse, “I’ve been doing so well sober I thought I’d reward myself with a drink.”


#1112

That is a fantastic one. Up there with “talking about being sober makes me drink”