Cravings a little higher at the moment. gonna get off my butt and go start dinner. maybe bake some bread or something.
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Do you go for walks? Those help sometimes.
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How did the bread baking go? I did that yesterday after a hard recovery related call, it helped and bread is delicious. I agree with Jante, walks or getting outside in general can be hugely helpful in tough moments.
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Hi @AmyBeth I missed this thread when you originally posted, just a little more inspiration to stay sober:
You mentioned before that you were having constant heartburn and stomach aches, I can tell you from my own experience that those are the symptoms of acute pancreatitis and you were probably on the verge of a lengthy hospital stay. The last time mine got so bad I had to go to the er I ended up in there for almost 2 weeks with most of it in ICU. Your pancreas had become so toxic it had swollen to the point the enzymes it produces to help digestion couldnt escape so they turned and began eating the pancreas itself 
Continuing to drink at any level at this point can lead to it becoming chronic and rather debilitating, youâll start to feel like that every time you eat or drink regardless of what it is. Keep your head up and dont let the relationship issues lead you back to the bottle, I know how easily that can happen as as well but it isnt worth ruining your life or your kids losing you over. I understand keeping the peace through the holidays but once Christmas is over Iâd say itâs time to evaluate what you and your kids are gaining vs losing by continuing the relationship.
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Made it through the cravings. I really thought I was gonna give in for that one sip. But I knew where that one sip would go. Right to my head along with the next one and the next. Then I would have so much regret and remorse tomorrow and would have to reset. Not happening today folks.
Bread didnât happen tonight. I forgot I had a batch of beef jerky that I had to make tonight or it woulda gone bad. That kept me busy for a bit. Then had to go pick up my son, which might I add that I was completely capable of doing because I was sober. Bread maybe tomorrow after work. Gotta brine the turkey too.
For now, sleep. 
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Well thank you for that info. I am happy to report that all digestive tracts are working very well these days. No heartburn, no bloating, no indigestion, no bad bathroom experiences. Body is actually digesting and using food properly now. 
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Havent delved into too many of my own flavorings although I am prepared to do so. For now I just use the Nesco flavors. People pay me for it and this one gals favorite is the Teryaki. I tried making venison jery but it wasnt fatty enough and wasnât ground. So basically I had made inedible leather. I will try it again one day though.
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I used to get acute pancreatic pain, usually after eating and smoking. Not sure what it was about that combination. It was the worst. Severe throbbing, burning pain in my gut that would move into my lower back. I used to hold it togther during an episode and ride it through until it passed.
A buddy of mine got cronic pancreatitis and renal failure from drinking. He was in the ICU for a few weeks. He has to drink Gatorade all day, everyday now or heâll die.
If that doesnât sober you up, not sure what will.
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Yep, that back pain is caused when ur pancreas is so inflamed its pressing against ur spine. I did the same for a couple years til the first time I went to the hospitalâŚit got to the point it didnt go away for about 5 days and the pain was more severe than itd ever been to the point that I passed out and my girlfriend made me go, its definitely not fun but it took 3 more years and 2 more long hospital stays b4 my dumbass had the good sense to put the bottle downâŚthe power that stuff has over us man smh
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woah. I was feeling lower back spasms towards the end. I thought it was just muscle strain but it wasnât a constant pain like a strain. It would come in waves. I had no idea it was alhohol induced pain. Thank you for that info.
When I started to try to cut down on drinking with the ultimate goal being able to stop drinking, I started taking several different vitamins that I read would help with alcohol withdrawl symptoms and would help replenish some of the vitamins my body was lacking due to drinking alcohol and not eating right. Magnesium, potasium, B complex, vitamin C, Milk Thistle, Probiotics all in the morning and then a multi vitamin and melatonin at bed time. I donât know if any of it really helped but maybe just helped my body to hang on a little longer. I am not taking any of those vitamins now nor am I drinking amd everything at this time seems to be doing well and improving. No more back pain stomach pain bloating etc. Wouldve never thought of the pancreas. Was only thinking of the stomach and liver mostly.
Fuck dude, Iâm glad you made it!
Read the whole thread, didnât know youâre in such a difficult situation with your husband.
I wish you a lot of strength and please always remember: your sobriety comes first. Donât let him pull you back down to the bottle, ok?
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Here we go again. Yesterday morning woken up at 2:30am and not allowed to go back to sleep. Today, Christmas, woken up at 3:30am. Not allowed to get any sleep today either I guess.
Iâll go make some coffee and put a smile on my face (fake as hell) and do my best to get through this day without losing it.
5:20am and heâs still rambling on. I canât believe heâs still drunk.
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Stay strong. Remember this is your journey.
Hope you have the best day.
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I failed. But only for a moment. Christmas evening I had a couple sips but none since. However my slipup wasnt even whats bad about this. I was arrested Wednesday morning and was put in jail for the night. Why? Well Christmas night arguments started and turned physical. I stated I was going to call his family and that sent him at me trying to put his hands around my neck. I defended myself⌠bit with a fork⌠A deadly weapon. Well maybe⌠I did stab him in the neck with it. But now the state issued a âstay away order of protectionâ so I cannot go home. The home in which I pay everything for. He bit the hand that feeds him. He needs to stop drinking.
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the kids are old enough to make their own decisions. They both decided to be home tonight. when school os back in they have to be home though. im allowed to pick them up and drop them off but have to do is a house away which os fine. my daughter is going to help with clothes and things i need after my initial pick up with the poice tomorrow. I am only allowed there one time with their supervision.
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plan is one day at a time. for the next couple days i will stay in my car. then a friends house for the 31st, 1st and 2nd. then i dont know yet. My step father still has some friends on the Island so hes gonna reach out to them.
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Thank you, Iâm gonna read it now!