Trying to kick each addiction one at a time

Hey guys, new to the forum. I’ve not been to a meeting in a few years. I found them tricky to work around my hospo work hours, hard to relate with as an atheist, and even harder to relate with as an addict of many different vices. My addictions come and go, I swap one with the other quite often. I’ve been drinking heavily daily at night for the past year. Have always struggled with alcoholism, substance addiction and sex addiction. I have periods where I can maintain some sobriety, but I seem to find myself back in the cycle of drinking again. I had a period of two years without alcohol, and then just took it up again, and all of my other behaviours like sex addiction and risky behaviours, smoking weed etc all crept back in. I keep finding myself going around and around, the self hate and guilt and sickness all make me want to do better. My antidepressants aren’t working because I’m drinking all the time, I want to be better. So I’m reaching out, to keep in touch, to read from this wide variety of stories and find support from people that know where I’m coming from. I’m at day one. Again. I want to be happy again.

7 Likes

Welcome Alycia. Very relatable story, thanks for telling it here. This place has been a huge help to me in maintaining my sobriety. By reading, by reaching out, by sharing my own story. By supporting and being supported. Hope it can be for you too. So many folks here each fighting their own good fights in their own ways. Together it is doable. Alone it’s too much. Welcome again and success!

3 Likes

Thank you Alycia I have same things . I am drug addict and sex addict but what I do is take a decision to stop what killing me so I start with drugs I going to NA meeting working on steps right now I clean for one year eight months, than I try to stop me compulsive behaviour about sex but fail so I asking for help they tell me there are some meeting that can help you so I started to going to SA meeting. So there are hope but you should take a decision no one can help you until you asking about it .

2 Likes

Welcome, this is an wonderful site to find like minded people going through similar if not the same addictions as you. I do alot of reading on here and its encouraging for me. Hope it will be for you as well. Stay strong

3 Likes

Hi. Your story sounds much like my own except I could never give up the drinking. The drugs I would go without for months or years at a time then pick back up but I never stopped with alcohol. The sexual and risky behaviors came and went more when I was drinking but still happened a lot when I wasn’t.

The only time since I was 15 that I’ve been sober completely is when I had major surgery or was pregnant.

The major difference is when I quit I didn’t want to I was forced. I needed a hip replacement because of my drinking and the doctor refused to do it if I continued to drink. My plan was to quit only until I had the surgery then I could start again. Then once I was sober I honestly loved the way I felt and here I am 982 days later still sober using my story to help others going to go back to school to make a career in helping people get sober.

I am always available to talk if you want. I don’t open up on the forums about the sex addiction as much as the drug and alcohol mostly just because there are more male then female sex addicts on here and I don’t want them to stumble in their recovery. Though you are welcome to message me about it.

2 Likes

Welcome @Alycia. Glad to have you join us.

1 Like

Thankyou Stella, I think the online groups might be the best option for me. Also the town I am is a somewhat rural so the meeting are limited, and even more limited in terms of multiple addictions.
I had a pretty good idea that I was an addict when I was in my early twenties but after a really serious incident with my husband we decided to quit drinking together for our kids. Before we drank heavily, we also smoked weed off and on. I smoked daily as a teenager. But we had a really good reason and motivation to quit drinking and we really stuck to it. I found good hobbies, I found a good place. But the last decade for me has been really hard, I lost both my parents to cancer, executed two wills and because a medical guardian in the process. And also have a younger sister that’s been in prison for the duration too. All of which has been really stressful. I broke my sobriety when I felt I was ready to moderate, and over the last few years have just found it escalate over and over. And I keep attempting half heartedly to quit, but not in an addiction type mindset, more of a ok I’ll dry up and then try moderation again. And everytime I start drinking again it gets worse and worse. I have the tools I know I need to use, I know I’m an addict. I just need support. I’m going to work a program. I’ve always just found it so difficult because I have so many vices, I’ve never known how to reign them all in at once. I’ve slowly learned over the years that weed makes me incredibly depressed, and I’ve also learned that sex is a temporary high that also leaves me depressed and guilt ridden. Alcohol seems to be the hardest one to kick, I work with it, it’s so social, it’s my way I relax with my husband, but it also ruins me. Steals my days with sickness, steals my money, and is making my mentally and physically unhealthy. Thanks for the support. Day 2

2 Likes

Thanks for reaching out. It’s hard to know which vice to tackle first. But I think alcohol will always be the biggest one for me, and the catalyst for my others. I find once I get a hold of my self control with alcohol, it’s easier to say no to my other vices. When I’m hungover and feeling sorry for myself or drunk and not thinking, I reach out to the other vices to try and make myself feel better. And it only gets worse.

2 Likes

Oh girl, I can hear the pain and defeat in your post. Sending lots of strength your way. :heart:

This site has a wealth of information available to all of us. I hope you will look around and read as much as you can. That was helpful for me, it might be for you as well.

I know all about that trying to moderate thing. It sure drives you nuts when you expend so much freakin energy on trying to make drinking alcohol work in your life. Have you read Annie Grace’s book. This Naked Mind? Your library can get you a copy if they don’t have one. I found it helpful. I am currently reading Quit Like A Woman and that one has a lot of interesting stuff in it for me. Everyone, of course, needs to find what works for them.

I know for me, I have to tackle one thing at a time. Gain some mastery over that one thing and then move on to the next change. If I try to do it all at once, I get overwhelmed too easily.

Welcome!! :heart:

2 Likes

Those books sound good, I’ll have a read. I also heard Russell Brand has some interesting books on recovery from different vices I was keen on having a look into.
Thanks for the support :heart:

1 Like

I hear good things about his book as well, I started it, but put it down and have yet to restart it…no particular reason I can recall right now Lol.

I like the other ones, especially Quit Like A Woman, because it is specifically for women. Though I will caution, it is not for everyone. I am really enjoying it tho. I appreciate a woman’s perspective.

:heart:

I too recommend In The Rooms. I have multiple issues all of which could be addressed by the 12 steps but I was finding it overwhelming to tackle them all at once.

In the rooms has a number of all women’s groups that focus on any addiction which is really helpful when you have more than one. The meetings are video meeting but you can totally remain off and out of participation if you choose to.

1 Like