I needed to read this right now. Fear is such an inabler. Fear makes me question everything. Fear makes me try to think of every outcome and hinders any change. I’m trying to recognize it and not let it overcome me so often.
I am the same exact way. Not to be dramatic lol but honestly it’s true.
I have two “controlling” addictions: exercise and food control-i keep using that term because I’m not sure how else to describe it. I like eating as little and as healthy as possible when I’m dealing with this addiction.
And two “out of control” addictions- alcohol and binging(food)… And alcohol too.
I’ve realized that I drink to get out of my head because I have a very controlling/obsessive/anxious mind and want to just relax. But I tend to over drink because I’m depressed/actually just am an alcoholic.
Anyways! Basically my goal is to get to the root of my depression. I mean I know what it is- Im struggling to make a decision because of fear. But I’m here if you ever want to talk about our negative obsessions lol
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I so hear you! I love that you are trying to be gentle with yourself. I also find myself scrambling to replace one addiction with another. I’m sober from alcohol - but for the first time in 19 years, I am dying for a cigarette. I am binging on sugar. And I’m biting my nails to pieces.
Control and anxiety - those are two huge factors in my addiction struggle.
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I’m still in bed so I consider that a good start to the day 
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Went swimming with the kids (that includes the biggest kid also known as the husband)
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Something I did for myself today was paint and play with rocks
Something I like about myself: I am grounded
Something I did for someone else: reiki healing, I cooked, I helped make jewelry and organized rocks with the smallest, did her laundry with her and had a dance party while she watched me paint today.
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Does eating 2 pumpkin spice cupcakes count?
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Thank you! I hope they make it through drying ok, turns out that is a difficult thing too lol. My cat got one already…and made her own on the toilet and couch lol
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I renewed my gym membership after months of not going… I have been free from drinking alcohol now for over 10 days and I feel great🌸 Time to get my body back in shape and eat healthy…
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Those paintings are beautiful!
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Awesome!! What do you normally do at the gym?
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Hey @Lionfish girl today I’m starting off with doing lower body exercises such as squats, lunges, and leg curls along with some cardio. My plan is to work out 6 days a week and use Wednesday’s a rest day… it’s been months since I’ve worked out fully but I’m ready to do it again. Since I’ve stopped drinking I crave junk food so I’ve decided to cut that out too. The money that I would spend on junk food and fast food was a lot and I couldn’t believe it!
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Haha I can’t believe my craving for junk food since being sober lol I just keep telling myself it’s better than drinking and being hungover af.
Sounds like you know what you’re doing at the gym, just make sure you don’t burn out too quickly! I always do this after time off from the gym. Think I can lift the same weight, think I can max out every time, think I can workout for long periods etc.
Good luck starting out again-you got this!!
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Called people. To help soothe my paranoia!
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Walked and mulled things over, then hit my knees and talked to God.
How I like to start everyday.
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Sat outside. Listened to rain and birds.
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Yes I’m trying to get into the habit of meditation,I have a YouTube senior yoga routine to try as we’ll,so thank you for reminding me to get on it and get on it!
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I got someone on to another sober application,made a to do list,visited with Freind yesterday on a rare day out,and am calling to make my first therapy appointment!
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