Recently I’m feeling a real lack of motivation, confidence and core strength. I just feel overwhelmingly negative and pessimistic ALL the time. Days often fly by having done absolutely nothing, and I still feel drained and hopeless. This becomes weeks, months, years in the end… I lack the initiative to break free and just live and try. It took many years to acknowledge and work on quite severe ptsd and several subsequent controlling addictions, and it’s drained me somehow. As if checking myself has taken away my sense of purpose. I’m just soaked in negativity and it’s stopping me from progressing. Even if I’m sober now, I know it can’t continue like this when the going gets tough soon enough, which it’s bound to. What can I do? What would you recommend? What helps/has helped you? What now/next? How can a current fight just to get by become a fight to actually progress and grow? I don’t want to fall into the pit again because I’ll never escape otherwise, but I’m so lost somehow… Any help is much appreciated 
It sounds to me your higher power shed a light on your path
The emotions you feel are say “change it up, do what you love”
I’ve heard peopls chemistry changes every 7 to 10 years. That’s a physical change.
So what do you love
What would you like to be doing
What is your passion
Dont be overwhelmed because that will just be way confusing and exosting and will get you nowhere
I’m going to leave it at that and letothers input add on or even be more comprehensable then mine
I’ll be here reading with you
Stay strong
You are very special
A daily dose of gratitude keeps my head pointed in the right direction. I deal with a chronic illness which limits my physical abilities and leaves me in crippling pain sometimes. It would be very easy for me to wallow in self pity, and get negative. There is no benefit in that… Seriously, I have suffered enough. The last thing I want is to be miserable in recovery too. So when I see those thoughts or behaviours surfacing I pull my head out of my ass, get to meetings and get on that gratitude thread. It helps me in a big way.
I get the same feeling at times, just try to redirect my focus and purpose in life. I realize that nothing lasts forever so try to enjoy my time here even if im not in the best position i can be in, just acknowledge the feelings and not let them control my out look on my life. Alot of the times im the one who pisses on my parade so i try to accept the fact that it just happens sometimes.
Hope your able to get the confidence and motivation back up soon.
Is there anything in your life that can give you a sense of purpose? A hobby, a job, family, exercise each day? Having a sense of purpose can really help your mental wellbeing, but it doesn’t have to be some massive world changing thing. And don’t beat yourself up if you’re not productive! We are not machines. I find if I write a small manageable to-do list and include something I want to do like read a book or listen to a podcast I feel better at the end of the day. And exercise helps! And therapy, but I always recommend that, lol.