Thank you for sharing!
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You’re welcome and hey! Welcome to the community!
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Love this so much. Thank you!!
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This is excellent information. A plan is how I made it this far.
My plan now is to network. Find sober connections. When I’m isolated, my mind twists things.
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It’s a very detailed plan. It’s one I didn’t follow, but it seems to be universally popular. I suggest that it be carefully considered by anyone trying to break the cycle.
I didn’t follow it, and I didn’t use AA or any other programmes, but that’s just me.
What I did was threefold: firstly, I had a long hard look at myself and my behaviour. I looked at the effect alcohol was having on me and, by proximity, to my family. Everything that I could do to add to the pile of reasons to give up was added. I dragged up the worst memories of stupidities committed while drunk - both by me and by others. By the end of this examination I knew that there was only one way forward for me, which was to stop.
I consulted with my doctor, and not simply to get medical supervision, but also to start on the third step of psychological preparation, which was…
I told everybody that was in my circle that I was giving up. This was to create an expectation external to me. It achieved something else too: it clarified to others that I had a problem and would need their help to overcome it. They all without exception, and without pause, agreed to be there for me.
Then I went to a clinic for a few weeks. Week one they clobbered me with the medication cosh and after that week, I gradually assimilated into sobriety.
It helped that I I had created expectations. This worked for me in two ways. Yes, it created a pressure which was external; I’m a reasonably successful type in what I do, and it was no harm to publicly state an aspiration - and to further define it as a need. It also involved good friends in the cure. They know how to behave with me - which has over time become pretty much the same way it was before. We enjoy meeting up, and they are aware of how to include me in their rounds. If I visit a house for dinner, there will be alcohol-free options available.
For me, the medical intervention was absolutely required. I’d tried quite a few times to go cold turkey and that led to seizures in my case. Medical supervision was a necessity.
This worked for me, but it likely won’t have global appeal. I sort of wanted to avoid regular meetings, and found at least some inner strength to get by.
When I say I’m generally a successful guy, by the way, that means outwardly. I have a good game, but still have all the doubts and weaknesses we all share and possibly some more…
It’s been a few years now. I don’t live it day by day. I’ve made sobriety part of me. Indeed, the sort of noise that I created when I gave up has acted as a spur to remain on the wagon, and the longer it gets the higher the fall.
I remain wary, though. With time, that level of expectation around me has diminished in one way, and ramped up in another.
By that I mean that I am seen as sober, and those who know me no longer have to adjust around me; that pressure is eased. It has increased in the sense that as time passes, a relapse would be seen as a much bigger issue among those around me. Not a failure, but nearer to a tragedy. In fact, I would possibly lose many of them.
Time has healed most of the damage, making me stronger. It has also raised the stakes in a way that suits me.
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Today it’s to keep busy, and not fall into “the routine”. Definitely thinking early bed.
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My plan is to put my higher power and myself first. I had 6 and half years clean and I relapsed and now I’m on day one now. My plan is to do the next right thing and ask for help even though I’ve done the 12 steps and therapy but this time I’m doing the steps on things I’m currently going through right now and things that I hold onto from my past. I am important today is what I’m telling myself. If there is any women strong in their recovery and is open for being a sponsor please don’t hesitate to reply to my post. Thanks all of you. We do recover
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Thank you for sharing…you are right on target. I am a year sober and it is crazy to look back and see all the phases I went through. This is a great resource for all of us. Sobriety is an amazing thing, thankful everyday and my journey is not over.
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Very informative. I actually am about to print this out and share with others! Thank you!
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How are you doing? @illvemydad
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How can I make my very own post
Hey I’ve been sober for 937 day. I’ve been working on myself & I’m to ashamed to admit this to my partner but I Will admit it to the World so I May Cleanse myself of the Guilt so I may find forgiveness to MYSELF! I have GODS FORGIVENESS.but I need to find mine. So in
All total Vulerability & transparency I am 46 when I was 19 I got real heavy into crack & I started staying with this guy & I started getting his jack Russell terrier high on crack. I STILL remember the look in that little dogs eyes when we would have to leave to make a run to get more! I’m sober now. I’ve been able to forgive myself on some things just not this. The dog didn’t choose it. I forced that on an innocent animal who could not defend itself. I feel a monster.
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Maybe write a letter to that little terrier?? Burn it afterwards if u want? But I bet he’s already forgiven you and you don’t need that extra weight going forward in recovery. I’ve wrote many letters! I hope you find healing from this Christine. Hugs xxx
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On the main page go to the top right where it says “New Topic”
You can title your topic and find the category for the topic here as well as start your first post.
Hope this helps.
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I am still going strong 
thank you
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That is terrific to hear!
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Thanks a bunch! I came to this community by chance a little over a week ago and this was the first post I seen. I just made it all the way through it today. The 1st day I stopped bcuz you mentioned some authors and I hadn’t heard of them. I looked up Alan Carr and next thing you know I’m reading easy way to stop smoking. Great book and I’m in day4 without smoking. This post should be the 1st thing prople see when they get here. Once again thx!
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Great post and congratulations on your sober days.
I really really appreciate this very detailed explanation of the science behind quitting and how we might feel and what we might experience as we navigate recovery.
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Thankyou! I am coming back, my new clean date is April 3rd 2025! Today is day 11 and i am feeling optimisitic and my physical health has been improving!
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