My three year old has a fever and a sore throat. He was up most of the night - cranky, restless…and wanting me to help him feel better. My Fitbit tauntingly tells me that I slept 3 hours, 4 minutes last night.
Recently, my five year old had a health scare that turned out to be fine. I was a nervous wreck in the interim, but I didn’t drink. I don’t drink today - no matter what.
I have trouble putting into words my gratitude for being sober today. The gift of waking up clear headed and able to be the loving, attentive mama that my little boys want and need is absolutely priceless. In finally being able to step outside the fuzzy haze of booze, I’ve found the joy in being able to show up fully for those I care about.
The gifts of sobriety are sometimes subtle - until I remember what life was like before. Many of you have heard me say what my sponsor told me early on. If you play your cards right, your children will never remember you as a drunk.
Holding my sleeping little one, I sit here with tears in my eyes as I realize, yet again, how thankful I am for this second chance to live as I should.
Thank you, all, for helping me stay sober today.
