I keep dragging around whats bringing me down, If I’d just let go I’d be set free…HOLding OOoONn! Why is everything so heavy?
It’s hard to get this done but if/when you can do it it’s almost like the weight of the world is lifted. Here’s what I had to tell myself multiple times daily at first!
Acceptance
"And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation – some fact of my life – unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.
“Nothing, absolutely nothing happens in God’s world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept life completely on life’s terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes.”
My counselor harped that at me I understand why now! I was on the phone with her 2 days ago thanking her for that. A great read for me was page 416-417 from the AA big book. The text is part of it.
Thank you for your words of wisdom. However, I don’t believe in a higher power or surrendering yourself to an imaginary “god” to guide you and solve all your problems. This is partially why I am not interested in AA meetings. I believe in self empowerment and free thinking. And i know this comment is going to make me unpopular with some or many people on this forum but this is the first time I’ve said this “out loud” (in text) to fellow addicts and to me that is a big step in my journey, so i hope it is taken with a grain of salt. I respect your beliefs and hope you respect mine as well. Congrats on your progress. I hope to find my “higher power” someday 
I totally respect your beliefs I’m not going to push anything on you. That first paragraph has everything you need to practice and it has no mention of a higher power. Just because you don’t have a higher power doesn’t mean you can not get benefit from any of that text. It’s not all or nothing. And I’m certainly not trying to push you towards AA if you are uncomfortable with it but again that first paragraph was what I repeated hundreds if not thousands of times. I think you have gotten the suggestion SMART and Women for Sobriety programs too. Have you looked for their philosophy on acceptance?
I have not been to a meeting other than group meetings during inpatient or IOP. I tried this route over the last couple of weeks but even this isn’t holding me accountable and keeping me sober. I just suck at this whole sobriety thing. I guess I’m all talk and no game, just like my friends and family think.
I wouldn’t label yourself! This will be one of the hardest things you will do in your life. I will never have this beat. But I’m going to try like hell everyday to not ever go back. And truly if you are searching for something to hold you accountable that’s going to be tough. Inpatient treatment mostly can do that but it’s what a month then guess who is in charge of your accountability again. I’m not an authority on recovery I do have an opinion is all. That being said I know I COULD NOT do this without a program. Look into SMART and or Women for Sobriety they are non secular. I’m sorry I don’t know your gender as of yet. Hence why I recommend the later one. You can not just decide you quit one day and expect everything to go smoothly. There’s a crap ton of work you have to put in.
Take the word God out of chads post the it bothers you. Instead of “nothing happens in Gods world” just "nothing happens in The World by mistake
Heard this song the other day with my wife. I said to her “this song is about sobriety. It has to be” after just watching the video I’m pretty sure it is. Espececially the I’m Not the center of the universe" part.
Thanks for postin:)
The world of regret, missed opportunities,… I guess it doesn’t have to be a god. Maybe “higher power” is just "bigger opportunities, brighter future, healthier lifestyle, enjoying the little things and taking on the simple tasks with a clear mind. WTF am I doing with my life?!? I’m sorry @Chad_R , I didn’t mean to be “anti-god”. I wasn’t seeing the bigger picture.
Not about sobriety. About being caught up in your addiction. As he was.
Not everyone can be set free like you were. Don’t ever go back.
You owe me no apology! I’m not pushing a god or higher power. I’m telling you this right here carried my ass through the toughest shit in my life:
Acceptance
"And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation – some fact of my life – unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.
@Chad_R I know that was the same quote as before but for some reason I read it differently this time. I guess I’m gonna have to stop disregarding a paragraph just because I see that scary god word pop up
Good morning,while I do disagree with your beliefs and we don’t match up on that subject,here is my approach on here. I intend to respect all on here regardless of there personal beliefs. I think everyone has the right to make suggestions and then people can choose what they are interested in trying. So I would say don’t be overly concerned with the popularity thing. At the end of the day these addictions don’t give two cents about our belief or who is popular or not, in fact for a lot of people trying to be popular is a lot of what got them into this. We all have addiction in common and we are fighting that together.
did a top table last week with my friend john , hes dosnt belive in a higher power i do, hes 30 years sober and so am I , room for everyone , everyone have a good day
Im done with my fight. Good day
Well, I hope that is not true,but the great thing is you are the only one who gets to decide that. Have a good day and my best to you.
Wow, not sure why this turned into a religious thread. Hi @StrengthoftheMind817, you are the only person you need answer too, you are the one who makes your choices and decisions, please stay with the forum, there are so many more threads and advice to help. Best of luck x
I want to go back to your original question, and answer it from a completely secular guy’s point of view. I’m a hardcore atheist. Not only do I not believe in a higher power, I think religion is evil. So there’s my credentials to answer this:
You answered your own question: Everything is so heavy because you keep dragging it around.
So let it go. Everything you’ve done up to this moment is in the past. You can’t change it. So why keep dragging around the emotions that go with it? Learn what you need to learn from it and move forward to the next moment.
Time is simply an endless series of moments stitched together. You can weave the future, but you can’t unravel the past, so you might as well let it go and focus on this moment. If you have a craving in this moment, decide what you’re going to do about it and move in that direction. If you relapse, then take the next moment and decide if you’re going to continue in that direction or change it up. Let go of the emotions that go with those decisions once you’ve made them. Learn, decide, act, move on.