For the past 6-7 years I’ve smoked meth on a daily basis, at least 4-5 times every day. I would probably spend anywhere from 250$ to 500$ a month every month. I’ve been toying with the idea to quit, and I’ve done it before the most recent time relapsing after roughly 2 1/2 months. The other day I had ended up taking a nap and woke up about 5 hours since using and already felt the headache and decided the nap got me through 5 hours already so I would just start then. Not many people know of my use and really only 1 knows the true extent of it as he’s someone I see and speak to daily, occasionally spends the night, and has a similar past, so I’ve never felt the need to try to hide it from him either. He is supportive of me quitting and has tried to previously motivate me to, or expressed concern wishing me to at least slow down. However, he’s not really able to be there enough to make me feel like I’m not doing this alone. Using for as long as I have, and as much as I have, I know quitting cold turkey will be rough, however after making it over 24hrs so far I don’t want to pick anything up to attempt to “taper down”. I know me, and there’s no such thing as using a little or using less, I’m pretty much all or nothing.
Have you considered a rehab or 12 step program?
Welcome @Zalana, I so proud of you for making the decision to quit. Is it going to be difficult? You bet it is, but you have already come so far! I don’t know much about meth except it’s a horrible addiction. I suggest you talk to your Dr about help as well as going to some NA or AA meetings. Everyone in the meetings have been amazing and very helpful. I would not be sober over a year now without outside support. I also couldnt taper off i had to cold turkey it but i did use naltrexone to help with the cravings in the beginning. Make sure to get lots of rest and take care of yourself you deserve a clean life as do all you babies.
I know logically, this should take priority of anything else, but for several different reasons I really just cant afford to be away at treatment or go to a rehab facility
-I also am continuing to work 40-45hrs a week, although today’s my last day off from a paid 6 days off from work I took for the first time in maybe 4 years.
AA and NA are free and only take up an hour at a time. I will say though that all the things stopping you from going to rehab will be the first things to go if you keep using.
It’s moreso financial responsibilities and things going on in my life that I can’t afford to not work. For instance I recently had a roommate that randomly quit paying rent and I had to pay 1400$ a month by myself for the past 5 months. Now with a new roommate I still have to go to the old place to clean it up as the lease ends in a few days and she left an insane amount of garbage and damages I’m attempting to take care of
And just with how private my usage has been Id much rather keep it unknown about (i.e not announcing departure to rehab) until I’m further into sobriety at least
Like I said AA and NA are free.
I would definitely consider meetings though, possibly since the person who knows about my use has a similar past and is seeking sobriety from everything as well, invite him to tag along
The buddy system is great. I would have loved to have someone come with me. Just make sure you two talk to other people there if you are comfortable.
The anonymous aspect definitely makes me more willing to share/open up. Although I’d invite him to go, I honestly wouldn’t expect him to come with me, which I know even with me expecting him not to, would still make me feel let down and reinforce that I have to go through all of this alone. Just a bummer really
You will never be alone. At the very least you have us. We aren’t as good as in person support but we are pretty good.
It’s hard to fall out of the boat if you stay in the middle. Surround yourself with recovery and it’s harder to slip.
That was mostly my motivation to download this app, at least someone somewhere might be up at the strange hours I have weak moments or at least there will be similar stories to read of someone I relate to
I’ve got a history of disordered eating and past depression so I already know the intense depression accompanying withdrawal will hit me like a train
Knowing is half the battle. It sounds like you’ve been through it before so you at least have an idea of what to expect
Yeah Ive done the cold turkey method about 4-5 times before over the course of 6-7 years