Bad Dreams (early in sobriety)

Just woke myself up by crying from a bad dream… this is my second time getting sober, cold turkey, and I must say this is the part I’ve always disliked. My nightmares slowly turn into night terrors which in turn I end up having insomnia till I’m no longer scared of my subconscious thoughts while asleep and tonight I just had the beginning stages of what’s to come…
The dream was more then real as my own internal true emotions and feelings that I have consciously were there and of course it had to do with my family and my brothers small business that I worked for till just recently. I truly loved/still love the work I did as its very dear to my souls spark and true happiness. Honestly it hurts to now be awake replaying this dream and the words said to me.

Maybe soon I’ll tell my current story of how I chose to become sober so I’m better understood.

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Thanks for those kind words. I’m definitely still trucking along and will continue to work on being happy while sober so I truly don’t have to go through this stage again.

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Jordan Peterson puts it best.

Don’t be too attached to your dreams - Dreams shed light on the dim places where reason itself has yet to voyage.

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Last night I had two. Pushed through the first one because I really need sleep and had another which just woke me up crying again. Ugh. Mostly they are about my girlfriend and my family. Two things very dear to me so it makes them tougher then normal.

I remember the first time I got sober I had to deal with what I’d done to them during my drunken episodes in my dreams but this time around I’m dealing with how they are choosing to treat me and stuff that truly hurts my core.

So the last couple nights I’ve either had scary dreams, or funny ones. It’s very random. However I keep having these dream where my brother and I get into an actual fight and argue. This is truly not normal as my brother and I have always been kind and loving towards each other.
But I keep having these dreams where we fight then argue about why I didn’t tell him what happened when I left our town to go a handful of hours away to another town to then lead me into my sobriety (if you didnt read my story this is a small synopsis).

Anyways it’s the same crap…I feel maybe I’m actually very upset about what he asked me to do which then led to an ultimatum that I was unaware of. However, I don’t think about it daily or hardly ever. It’s just there in the back of my mind kinda hidden not really being paid much attention too.

I also don’t know why I can’t just come out and say it to you all. I feel ashamed with myself that I even got so bad. I’m happy to be sober for sure but so sad it took all of this alcohol drugs and running away trying to kill myself to now being here cleaning.

:disappointed:

I used to have using dreams/nightmares too. They will go away in time, just so you know. They will lessen in intensity, too.

I am a firm believer in the idea that dreams are often functions of our subconscious that are helping us process the emotions, thoughts, and experiences that we are not consciously dealing with. Do you think that maybe you could benefit from some counseling? Or just talking to someone about some of the themes in your dreams?

Hey man, I’ll be honest with you, nightmares are part of my story, and a lot of the reason why I would drink so heavily.

I feared sleep, because it always led to nightmares, for months I had this recurring one where I’m in the Middle East in a firefight and I have no idea where I’m at, I’m in a small unit and we are cut off from the rest of the support team, it freaked me out,

I tried everything so the answer became drink until I would pass out, I had no dreams, I drowned my subconscious and in the end I felt like shit when I woke up, it led me to a concoction of Red Bull and vodka, plus aderall to keep me going, it was a dangerous concoction because I was using it to extreme levels, how my heart didn’t explode is beyond me.

I would make the suggestion to speak to a therapist or a psychiatrist what I was told is dreams are your subconscious letting out the thoughts you have, I have been prescribed medications for it, they have been helpful because my sleep patterns greatly affect my everyday life. If I sleep good no anxiety or depression, other than processing normal expectations and feelings. To say I’m cured is bullshit, but it has been helpful

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