Have to go to boyfriends to help after surgery. What if he has alcohol in house?
I know this sounds dumb, and I also know it’s easier said than done, but don’t drink it. Don’t look for it. Ask your higher power to remove the obsession to drink. Take a friend from the rooms who can help you not drink. Bring the topic up at a meeting.
I have a friend that is going to come over for an hour to go for a walk. The nights are going to be hard.
I guess think about your motives for drinking? I uses to drink to a) numb anxiety and b) make socialising easier. So part of staying sober was me confronting those two motives.
Do you need to drink around your boyfriend? Does he know about your drinking? Why would being at his house challenge your sobriety?
He drinks but not around me. I am worried about it just being there. Don’t want to be tempted.
Get your friend to get the alcohol out of the house before you go there or your mom, dad or even a sibling.
If it’s already making you uncomfortable, how about telling your boyfriend? Depending on how much you’ve already shared of course.
If it comes to it, try to play it through in your mind and imagine how bad you’ll feel if you drink.
At the start I couldn’t stand going to family where they would have it on display. Sometimes I went outside to call a friend.
But those feelings are now few and far between.
Come on here and chat to us if you feel anxious.
I have talked to him. He says he will not have it in the frig but still… He doesn’t get it. Just knowing it is there.
I will talk to friends and you all in here. Wish me luck.
3 months sober and counting. Hope to stay sober over the weekend.
Correction I am 60 days sober
That’s amazing. You need to put this first. Use everything you’ve learnt and remember why you want this.
Royally pissed off. Boyfriend out of hospital (I checked) and doesn’t even bother to call me. Worried all day. Now I am just pissed off. Came so close to drinking. Didn’t. I am NOT going over there this weekend!!
Good for you. Right now, put yourself first Theresa. You’re doing great @60days and no one else should have the power over you to make you feel like drinking. I’m sorry he seems to not understand.
Stay strong! You got this!
I left voicemail telling him to stay at his brothers. I’m not putting up with this shit anymore. I’m not going to give him the power to make me drink. He’s not worth it.
I think you would be better off breaking up or separating til your have more confidence in your sobriety. Who knows u may meet an amazing guy that doesnt drink. Relationships are kinda hard to juggle when early in recovery. Congrats on 60 days!
Good for you Theresa, now go enjoy the best life has to offer with people who’ve got your back:)
He called and I told him just what I felt. Used fuckin too many times I suppose. Told him I’m done. I feel a little better now. Didn’t even ask how it went. Figured pretty good if he came home and didn’t call. Am I wrong the way I handled it?
Sounds like you did what was best for you. People pleasing is actually something that gets discussed at meetings. We try so hard to make everyone happy that we forget to worry about ourselves. Good for you for sticking to your guns and doing what you needed too.
Just returned from an AA meeting in my hometown. The topic was resentments
He called this am but I didn’t answer the call. He called this afternoon and I told him I didn’t want to be in the relationship anymore. He actually apologized for not calling me. Now I have to figure out how to make it totally on my own. Went from 1st husband to 2nd (for 20 years) and then to boyfriend. Haven’t been on my own for a long time.