Your best sober day and worst when you were drunk

My best day was when I’ve back from closed therapy. It was amazing. I felt as a new person. My family wanted to be with me again with a hope that from now on everything will changed. I still cry a little when I see this in my mind.
The worst day I had this was the day when I’ve heard from my wife that she wants to divorce. It was like an poison arrow in my heart. I know that it is my fault but it was like the end of the world.
We are still together but not yet in big love. I am walking on thin line. One more time I am drunk and all will be finished between us. The only hope for me is to be sober and day after day to show her how much I want to change myself and earn her love again.
It is so short way from happines to sadness but the road from the sadness to real happiness and trust is longer that you can imagine.
I am on the beginning of that road but hope I will go only forward and never look back

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I had some wonderful days since I sobered up, especially when backpacking earlier this year. Everything has a different taste now actually, I appreciate even the little things in life. And I think that, as long as I keep on track, the best is still to come.

I don’t like to bring back ghosts from the past, because it still hurts to remember the harm I’ve done to people I love(d) most. But, it is imprinted in my mind the day I got really aggressive towards my family -my father especially-and swore at him the ugliest words. And I can’t forget the look in his face - he was afraid of me. That’s the saddest memory! After a while my father passed away, and we were good by then, but I’ll never forget that look. I’ll never be that monster again!

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Thanks for the topic and sharing! We stay sober one day at a time! Sometimes 5 min to 5 min. I always say I’m a miracle in the making! We all are!

I’ve had many “worst” days. I’ll name a few.
When I was homeless in Ohio, staying at a trap house that night, with no heat or water and it was the middle of winter. I slept in my winter coat that night, feening and sick and cold. I cried myself to sleep…
Looking myself in the mirror and not recognizing who was looking back at me… I just used more and more and more that day.i
Leaving rehab to go get high… and my parents, God love them, drove 3 hours just to try to stop me. I refused their offer and they asked me to take a picture with them before I left. In their minds that might of been the last time they would see me… how scary that must of been…
Getting my stuff packed for rehab and my grandma came to say goodbye to me. It was only the second time I saw her cry. I was hurting her while killing myself!
Coming home from rehab just to use again and my poor cat was so skinny and lonely. I had been gone for 2 weeks and someone was taking care of the cat while I was gone… Needless to say, I just used to cover those shitty feelings up…
The night I was nodding off so bad that I couldnt even use anymore. I drove home and almost killed myself. I’m very lucky I didnt kill someone else. I drove across 4 lanes of traffic almost hitting a telephone pole… the next day, I woke up high, still nodding off. My sponsor took me to a meeting that morning. People were crying and scared for me.
The day I realized my life was out of control and I still couldnt stop using… I learned that day that I was an addict…
Seeing my nephew for the first time and I was high.
Prostituting myself for drugs and money and mise well add alcohol in there…
The night I got my DUI. I could have killed someone or myself. I had no business doing what I did!
My nephew getting taken out of my life… ouch!
And the list goes on and on and on…

Now some of my “best” days sober…
My wedding day!
My wedding reception day! (Diff day than the wedding lol)
My parents telling me their proud of me and we’ll get through this.
The first time going to an AA meeting and wanting to be there.
Surrendering to this disease!
Seeing my nephew for the first time sober! And hes even aloud to come stay the night with me today!
Telling my nephew a bed time story for the first time.
Realizing, I did not have to continue to use and drink. That there was a different way of life.
Being happy for the first time in a long time.
Laughing until it hurt for the first time sober. I didnt even smile much when I was using.
My sober honeymoon and little weekend trips.
Realizing I wanted to spend the rest of my life with my wife.
Telling someone the first time that I had experienced sexual abuse as a child. It was like a weight lifted off me and I didnt have to use over it anymore. It lost its power over me…
Becoming employable and holding down a full time job.
Getting a new car.
Making true friends and having support tpfay.
Keeping my word and following through with my promises.
Helping my sponsee’s and others.
Being able to do the things I enjoy today and having the funds to do them.
Going to a park and looking at the beautiful views.
Driving and realizing my surroundings, especially the first time.
Realizing that those little “coincidences” are my higher power.
And the list goes on and on and on…

If I can get sober and stay sober, Anyone can! It was about changing my way of thinking. Doing the things I dont want to do or that dont seem ideal. Hitting meetings and got active in AA. Arriving early to meetings and staying late. Getting a sponsor and working the 12 Steps. The Steps are saving my life. Being held accountable! Having support. Picking up the phone before I use, not after. Getting honest. Staying willing. Keeping an open mind. Learning to love myself and believing in myself. Staying strong. Praying to my higher power, just something, Suggested that its loving, caring, and greater than you. The Serenity Prayer is my go to today, not a drink or drug. I had to ask for help and take suggestions. This app helps too but I needed more than just the app itself.
I’m a miracle in the making and so are you! We can do this!

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Amazing story. I hope my story will also have a happy end

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