I think that in order to maintain sobriety one MUST change how they view alcohol. It is such a societal norm to drink and drink in excess. I feel like its easy for people to relapse because of those pressures. There are many reasons why people drink. As @PatronSaint said - identifying the root of the alcohol use is pivotal. Once we identify the root of drinking then we can change how we view alcohol and the role it plays in our lives.
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Well said!!!
Finding out WHY i drink and working on it.
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A solid bucket list
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Thatās great!! I read this the other day and your story made me think of itā¦
āSometimes what you are most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you freeā
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Inner peace. This feeling comes largely from accepting others for who they are and accepting myself for who I am.
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Apparently more confidence! Iām going to be working on that again now.
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Connections with people, either through this forum or at meetings, who are on the same sober journey.
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Education. Learning as much as you can about yourself and how your addiction serves you so that you can find better skills and tools to get through life.
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YES @LeilaBird I absolutely agree. I have the same attitude (perhaps itās part of my super-woman complex). I think that accomplishing other goals helps to reaffirm the āI can do anything I set my mind toā feeling I have. Also making a list of prior accomplishments or other bad habits successfully broken could be helpful. I donāt have a physical list but maybe Iāll make one just as another booster for dark days!
In the same veinā¦ I also have the attitude of āI survived (insert life struggle) so I definitely can make it through this!ā But I donāt just want to survive. I want to thrive. 
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I donāt mean to give the false impression that I have a feeling of self confidence because that would be a dangerous suggestion to people who donāt feel confident or have higher anxiety. I sometimes feel very anxious even about things that I have done successfully many times. However, I try to use the evidence that I have succeeded in the past to motivate me. This is a technique from CBT so I call it confidence or knowledge. On the other hand it functions like āfaithā in that I use this knowledge even when my feelings are telling me to run away.
Most of us here have succeeded at some very difficult things and I believe that our knowledge of this should feed into a kind of āconfidenceā or āfaithā that we can do this.
For illustration here is an example of me trying to talk myself into running which is something I do successfully all the time with great results and have done for a couple of years:
Me: Time to go for a run
Id: Itās cold out. You are tired
Me: Itās not cold. Anything above -2 is perfect once you get moving
Id: Procrastinating for 10 minutes on the computer
Me: Still going for a run
Id: I want gloves, you need to find those. And a hat
Me: You know youāre going to be pulling those off after the first lap but fine
Id: Scarf too
Me: Sigh
Id: Checks self in mirror, feels fat, doesnāt think there is time to run now. Goes back to the computer to check the time
Me: Time to go
Id: I want a cup of tea
Me: We get a glass of water now and I will get the tea ready so that when we get back it will only take a minute. Final offer.
Both: Finally go for a run 45 minutes later. Feel awesome as usual especially after hitting the sweet spot about 20 minutes in. By this point I am carrying my hat and gloves.
If I listened to my feelings I wouldnāt do it but I know that I can run and I will feel better if I do.
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Me also johnsee and finding more laughter too!
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Thank you-Iām going to start a list. I havenāt done that in too long. 
@MissQuinn As you can see from my previous post, I am far from having a wonder woman complex but I think a list of previous accomplishments is a great idea as a form of self-affirmation. I may do that and stick it on my fridge.
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OMGSH!! This is me except I donāt run.
I often find myself asking my self many many wasted minutes sometimes hours away- what is it that I allow to hold me back from getting going??? I think I need more self love and discipline along with motivators and rewards which would be better health and accomplishment. I often see others be gobots and I wish I could learn that level of esteem. So after reading your self conversation I begin tomorrow doing more-thinking less!!
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Haha the āWonder Woman complexā is just a name for my feelings of having to be strong in every situation. Sometimes when I refer to it itās because Iām trying to do too much. But other times I think of it in a positive light. Itās the inner voice telling me to push harder, put in work, and not be afraid.
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I SO love this pic!!! Strength!
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Educationā¦lots of reading. And worksheets to get to know myself and my issues better. Also education on setting and maintaining healthy boundaries.
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Never romancing alcohol! And, if I ever find myself remembering āthe fun times,ā then I give myself a swift kick in the butt with all of the shit shit that alcoholism brings.
Focus, focus, focus. Donāt let yourself fall for the alcoholic mind tricks.
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Self care.You have to want to take care of yourself.Mind and body.Do things each day to help with that and you will be stronger every day.
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