Day one trying to escape bulimia. So many “days one” behind my back that I do not trust myself on this one. Still not understanding it, feeling weak as ever, I just hope to be good enough to start new.
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You are definitely not alone here. I am sorry you had a slip, and I understand how much that can hurt. Slipping can make the shame cut deeper than before and that feels so painful in wounds that haven’t even started healing yet. Know that you are worth a life free of this illness. You are so worth a life of freedom and self love. You are worth a fresh start but everything that you learned in the days of recovery you had before your slipped are not lost. That recovery was experience and it was not in vain. You are a stronger person now and you are wiser so take what you learned and apply it now.
Sending you a ton of strength and love
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I can relate with you , I had bulimia around 10 years ago , nearly lost my daughter with the illness , it was hard to change , weeks in hospital due to a bad fall after fainting in work and falling down stairs , still didn’t stop me. I feel guilt actually admitting to it as I really didn’t address it . You are strong and can beat it, take a day at a time, I believe in you .
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I find you extremely brave for having been through that and being able to tell. I see that every and each experience is so hurtful in its own way, but to share and empathize with one another must be a key to find the right solution for ourselves. I hope the best for you, admire your streght and wish to reach it myself
Thank you so much for your kind words. Seeking for support has never been easy for me, but finding it feels warm. I just hope to wake up someday and fiercly saying “i got this”. Hoping the best for you too, and that what you say will turn out right
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I am doing the same, seeking for a body in which i used to be, but in which i was never happy. I can’t wait to finally feel my mind healthy and strong. Thanks so much for your words
Hi queen. I can totally relate. It’s been one big year full of “first days” for me… And I’m still struggling with this… This is so hard. Sadly I can’t give you any piece of advice about how to get to “day 2“ but I would be really glad to fight this battle with you
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You will get there with persistence Adriana 
Now that you know better, it’s only a matter of time before rewiring your brain to proactively change is the only option you realise you have to move on happily in life 
Sometimes parts of our mind are not as right as they feel, but manipulative self-betrayal - only accustomed to abnormal behavior as a result of some external abnormal input we picked up somewhere some sadly vulnerable time. Admitting you are not right or on track is one of the hardest things for anyone to do, it’s almost challenging our brains evolution, so this first step is your greatest feat… Upon realising this, THE bravest thing to do is make it one of those most important life goals you know you need to overcome in life, to truly move on and feel the fresh air of freedom! You know what’s right, and you know what you want deep, deep, deep, down so don’t worry… you have your whole life to own this, and you WILL because this is your life Adriana, it’s short and can feel overwhelming sometimes, but it comes down to the little things in life which decide the big picture in the end. Ask yourself every waking hour who, when, where, why, what, how? Really… Focus, breathe, and know that this is for you…! You will be there for yourself when you need it most (& us! 
) You decided one day in life that you love yourself just the way you are…! To leave the comfortable but defunct past for a daunting but promising future. And bulimia was never the answer! Living healthily for yourself, 100%, but change comes from love NOT hate. The seed has been planted & it’s up to you to grow and blossom, one beautiful day at a time. Judge judgement, not your perfect self or this wonderful world! You’ve got this, and in fact SO much more than you know too Adriana… 
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I know this message was for Adriana but I wanted to let you know that it also helped me a lot. It gives me a little more confidence in my journey and I’ll definitely put your advice into practice. I’m sure it will help. Thank you for this wise and meaningful words.
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For me, my eating disorder is a means of control in my life when I feel I’m losing it. When I try to get to the root of why I’m feeling out of control and begin to tame that, the urge to b/p lessens. I still have severe panic around food and still struggle, but with help and patience and understanding we can begin to tame it. An ED is one of the hardest things to rewrite in your brain bc we have to change so much of our life and our way of living to accommodate it. Therapy has really helped me to understand this, and I strongly recommend seeing someone if you can. Sending you lots of love and solidarity. 
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Aw, thanks 
You’ve actually brightened up my day a little too with that response, big hug @Kubozoa!
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