Today is 18 days off of Opiates , I no longer need to wake up everyday wondering when my next line will be or when I will get it. I have changed so much in the last few weeks that I never thought would be possible again. I have a solid support system that is proud of me and believes in me and my sobriety. I never had the chance before to have a supportive system around me or it was always just conditional. I still have some of the side effects of my body finding its new normal. I am proud that everyday I am choosing my self and becoming the person I want to be, I am developing my own identity and finding things that make me smile again. I no longer want to end my life even though the emotions that I had pushed down to the abyss are coming up and I’m having to feel them.
I did have some hesitation on whether I really would be strong and not put myself in a situation that could be compromising but I didn’t , I felt normal and I just wanted to remove all of themmemories and objects that hold them rather then not feel or want something from them. I think it shows that sometimes you have to feel the worst pain in order to in return get the best joy.
. I’m glad you could keep yourself out of the situation that might have been compromising. In the early days of recovery recovery has to come first.