Welcome Philip! 
I’ve grappled with mental health stuff too, and the men in my family have been grappling with it on my dad’s side at least since my dad’s father. It has generational impacts.
It is possible to learn to live healthy. For us that means sober. Being in our addiction keeps us in chains.
The good news is you are not alone in overcoming addiction while living an interesting mental life (I like to think of it as interesting). There’s lots of people like this in addiction recovery.
Keep in touch here, and read some resources, and look at some groups you can join - groups helped me feel much less alone. There are groups online and in person.