I just had my 40th birthday on Friday and yet again decided i need to quit drinking. I relasped due to some changes that happened a year ago. I thought i could manage and maintain but all i keep doing is hurting those i love. This demon will forever be with me but i am strong willed to have it in the back of my mind. I have the support of those that knkw i need to quit. So there is no issue there.
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Hey glad you decided to give it another go and happy belated 40th. Itâs pretty much impossible to manage or moderate this, believe me Iâve tried every which way. Just keep trying new things till you find something that works, maybe multiple things at the same time.
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Focus on your recovery and give it your all!
What have you tried so far?
Have you quit already?
If you play your cards right you can be sober for 10 years at your 50th birthday 
How would that be?
Awesome right?
Being sober is not âjust quit drinkingâ, for me I needed a plan. I was here every day to check in sober and read and learn about my addiction. When I had cravings I followed my list of tips and tricks of what to do and act on it. If that doesnât worked I came here to vent. I did all beside drinking. Now almost 4,5 years sober.
A relapse can happen, but try to learn from it so you can avoid a new one. A relapse is not good for your state of mind (and body).
So whatâs your plan beside a focus on designing furniture 
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Once you give up on the myth of moderation, your life will be much easier. I really struggled with feelings of unfairness and resentment, WHY canât I drink like a âregularâ person? Once I accepted that just like not being able to do a handstand or roll my tongue, I just CANNOT drink, but I can do lots and lots of other things, if I want to, I began to feel freer. Have you read quit lit? Tried a program like AA or SMART?
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I know the feeling of thinking i could maintain i was sober from 2001 to 2010 then not sober from 2010 to late 2019 been sober since all i can recommend is smash the thought ull ever be able to drink/use like a normal person(maintain) if you are one of us (something only you can decide STEP 1.) Then keep it to today just a hint 2moro never comes everyday i wake up hoping tomorrow is here is always been today i wake up in and as long as i dont use today i have a fighting chance for the future God bless make it a bright future
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I used to go to smart recovery and have plans to go again. There is a recovery church i also went to as well and plan on that
I had a similar experience on my 40th. I am soon to be 45 and I just hit 100 days Alcohol free. I am just now really getting to know myself and that an unable to drink in moderation, as much as I told myself I could. Forgive yourself and take it one day at a time. You can do this!
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