Usually I awake to feelings of guilt about my previous days drinking and that guilt makes it easy to avoid alcohol the next day, that is until I’ve an hour or so to go before I finish work and start contemplating a few more heavy drinks just for a reward for a decent days work.
Today I’ve woke feeling without any guilt but with anxiety knowing it’s my first day back at work since giving up AGAIN!!
I know I’ll be fine throughout the day but when 5pm starts I’m dreading leaving work, I know I’m going to convince myself 1 days drinking in 6 is a great start and I’ll restart again tomorrow, deep down I know that it’s not good and that restarting tomorrow means a few weeks or months before I try to quit again.
Any pearls of wisdom / advice or experiences people could kindly offer.
Be kind to yourself. Give yourself room to heal. Be proud of the courage it takes to be in this moment, and to step into the next…
And don’t be afraid to look silly if it means you stay on the wagon.
I would comb my hair when I’d get anxious, even in the store, which calmed me enough to get through something stressful. Find something that works for you…
One moment at a time. What aligns with what you want and need that is best for your situation? If you feel it’s necessary to stop, than keep trying. Everyone’s situation is different but we share so many similarities in those differences. Guilt & shame are powerful enemies which seek no joy in moving on, but to overcome, one must move on.
First, take a deep breath…repeat this for a good minute. Think about why you want to stop the cycle. What improves if you decide to change your course? What stays the same or gets worse if you continue down the path?
Seems simplistic enough, but it’s something I have had to personally remind myself of in my 1 month and 48 days AF. It’s hard some days, but when it’s hard you have to dig deep and really talk it through to yourself.
The end of a work day was, and still is, super tempting for me too…my biggest defense is changing my route to be perfectly honest…even if that means going way out of my way. I’d rather drive longer and think myself out of a bad decision then drive the regular route and talk myself into a problem.
You can do this…it’s not easy, and can downright just plain suck sometimes, but in times like those I say to myself… who do you wanna be today? Now, in this moment…I want to be a clear minded healthy me…I wanna be the best version of myself.
Wishing you strength of mind and spirit. Don’t give up on you!
reaching out here as you walk into challenges is a great start.
That has helped me not drink as I walked through many challenges.
It shows that recovery is important to you, and it shows that you recognize alcohol as a problem in your life.
Our alcoholic thinking is the biggest obstacle in recovery. Thinking its going to be different or better this time is our biggest downfall in not drinking.
I dont hang out after work anymore. I avoid being around drinking as much as possible. I stay out of bars. I check in here frequently.
I recognize that its the first drink I need to avoid. I admit to myself that I am alcoholic, and I cannot reward myself with a drink. I have tried to be a normal drinker most of my life. It always brings problems.
I reward myself in other ways now. I buy myself cool things with money I save not drinking.
Five days is awesome! keep going! it gets much better if we work for it!
Like they say in aa. Keep simple simple stupid. I’m not saying your stupid or even calling you that, it’s just how the saying goes. Don’t drink. That’s it. I was having cravings bad yesterday for the first time in 2 1/2 weeks. But I didn’t drink, I reminded myself of all the negatives and that helped alot. I’d lose another job of I started, I always do…maybe not today maybe not tomorrow but that job is as good as gone for me if I start again.
After work, especially when the day is busy or stressful, is a huge trigger for me as well.
I find if I can tell my addicted brain we need to stop at home FIRST, just to change clothes, or whatever, by the time I get home and changed, I find the craving is gone and I can move on with my night.
It sounds silly, but by delaying cravings even just for a few minutes, I find that their power over me subsides…got me to almost 40 days alcohol free
As soon as you leave work get into a 24 hour zoom meeting on your phone and sit with those guys and listen, if you have to stay on it all night then so be it,
Drink a pint of water. I find that I don’t drink enough water when I’m in work, so I get a little dehydrated towards the end of my working day. That is when my addictive voice is the loudest. Drown it!
In the beginning try smaller goals. Don’t focus on “days”, turn your focus to “hours”. I was in the same situation. Just wanted that drink come 5pm. Straight to the liquor store after work. So, I started delaying myself. I can make it until 6pm. And so on… I’m hitting 30 days tomorrow.
Was fine, went a different way home, distracted myself with buying stuff to cook something different for tea, worked a treat. Just passed into my 7th day clean now, feel great, but concerned about getting over confident/cocky. Thanks for asking
Hi Matt,
I’m in day 69 of sobriety and also find the drive home from work the riskiest time for me. I’ve tried many things to cope and everyone here gave really good suggestions. I found that taking suggestions from others in recovery and trying them… even if I’m not sure they’ll work has helped me really start to build a good toolbox for these issues. “Take what you need and leave the rest.”
My fav ways to deal with the drive home now is:
Recovery podcasts! Listening to other people’s recovery stories is a good way to tune out the voice trying to talk me into stopping at that gas station. I really like recovery elevator.
If the podcasts aren’t helping I’ll call and catch-up with family or friends. Having someone to talk to about stressors is a good use of that car ride time.
I now always get gas first thing in the mornings. Some days after work I know if I stop at that store I’ll leave with alcohol, so I just don’t put myself in that position.
