6 months and 4 days, my dear all! It took me two years of failed attempts of stopping drinking to get here.
I noticed in the first few weeks sober that I’m not best friends with coffee anymore. That was strange.
My sleep got better, not magical as people say, but better. Also, excessive excercise makes me not being able to sleep, I realized. Especially heavy deadlift.
I lost almost no weight, two kilograms. I assume therefore that I didn’t gain much weight from alcohol itself, I gained a bit of weight because I wasn’t taking care of my diet. I was always training a lot but I secretly hoped that muscle definition will come by itself when I stopped drinking. Well, no lol. So now I’m on a diet as well.
But boyyy do I excell at my job! My job is really stresful during summers and I’m responsible for work of 30 people under me. Last year I really struggled because I was always hangover and felt like shit.
A few nights ago I dreamed I celebrated 6 months sober by drinking beer and I woke up super pissed off and sort of like hangover. That set up the mood for the whole day, I just couldn’t get over it, it was a bit like paws I guess (I haven’t had them before).
What helped me in the most difficul times was repeating a few sentences that I made up, I called it haiku against beer. I sticked to that every time I felt cravings (and man were they strong now when I look back).
The first post on this forum helped me tremendeously because there I read I could make my own program and plan, with guidance from that post as what to expect. So I did, that worked for me. I was never keen on going to AA because they’re on my third language and I really didn’t want to having to translate in my head something this important. I tried some online alcohol help thing, funded by the country, didn’t work for me.
It helped me to eat a proper meal instead of replacing it with beer as before.
I doubeld up my training and yoga and I found some additional group fitness programs, so that helped too.
The first saturday after stopping I went out and I didn’t even crave a bit, it helped that I designated myself a driver and taxi is really expensive and I had it with spending 60€ for a ride home. Then I discovered that I find drunk people annoying and boring so I wasn’t going out anymore. I don’t feel that social as I got older so that’s not a problem.
And to start with, it helped “It’s easy for women to stop drinking” by Alan Carr, although I didn’t relate to any of the women-specific parts. I read “This naked mind” by Annie Grace two times, listened three. I’m still reading Claire Pooley “Sober diaries” and I’m really not relating to anything there, but I like the positive tone of the book. “Girl walks out of the bar” I listened once, it made me upset. And I must mention “The unexpected joy of being sober” which I read last year, while drinking heavily, feeling miserable, sad, anxious, depressed, nervous and trying to find a clue what to do (EXCEPT stopping drinking at that time).
I love being sober, once I got used to it. I love having all my wits with me, not forgetting stuff, not being hungover. I love that I can completely trust myself now, that my thoughts and feelings are mine, not alcohol induced. I love mornings. I love life.
I’m very affraid not to fail again, that’s why I often have those nightmares that I’m drinking again. I heard stories of people beliving they’re off the hook after about 6 months sober and then they failed miserably.
In that sense I don’t think I’ll ever be off the hook.
Well, kämpa på!
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Congrats on 6 months and 4 days!! Keep going one day at a time.
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Wonderful Read. Congrats on your sobriety.
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What a great post @DoraV well done I want to be enjoying my sobriety like this too in 6months you inspire me 
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Thank you for sharing. I hope to one day get there too. Congrats on 6 months!
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Nicely done with your 6 months! 
Love your new routines and your sober journey! Keep going strong 
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