Well it’s been a hot minute since I’ve logged on here and made myself be accountable but when I feel like a relapse is going to happen THIS place has always been my safe place.
Some days I totally forget I’m a recovering addict, I don’t hold myself accountable and this is where it can spiral out of control, this is that danger zone where I’m talking with the gremlins that it will be okay to just pick up because I’ve had too many triggers and all that screams out is ‘USE’.
So here’s my active cry for support/help.
Be nice/don’t be nice!
It’s good to see you Danni. You’re doing the right thing by coming back here. When times get tough just get back to the basics of what got you to where you are. Do the next right thing.
You don’t feel like giving up or you wouldn’t be here. I’m glad you are Danni. We’re in this together and that’s why we’re here, you and me and all of us. using won’t help with anything. Coming here does. It makes us realise we’re not alone in this. Love and hugs & too long not seen X
I can totally relate. This option was taken long time ago. No turning back. Back would be the end, hell for me. But what if this didn’t matter? These thoughts and feelings will pass. Sometimes they stick like chewing gum or dog poop on Nike free soles but eventually they will leave.
Welcome home. I’m glad you exercised wisdom by coming here, when you need some support.
It’s a self-feeding cycle: stress leads to negative thoughts, negative thoughts lead to negative emotions
It’s further complicated when our previous answer to negative emotions was to react with negative behaviors.
When you find yourself in this cycle, maybe create a stop-action by focusing on the fact that you have been sober for 788 days…some good, some great, and some challenging. You got through them. You know that good and great days always come after bad ones. You can push through the current challenge, because you’ve pushed through previous ones.
I hope you’ll stay awhile, at least until you are ready to tackle it again on your own.
When I go there, I imagine what it will feel like the day after. The pain of letting the addiction take a hold of me and throw away all my days of living clean, makes me sick. Starting takes so much energy. So many crazy thoughts during those first days. I don’t want to relive that. I use this as leverage on myself when I am threatened. Somehow it helps. And then there is the source that rescued me to begin with. Still with you! May you find it NOW! Peace and blessings to you!
You can’t stop at 788. You’re motivating people like me. I think of sobriety like a diet. The longer I’m on this less I want to blow it. A few days in on a diet who cares if I have a super sized cheeseburger? But 788 days no way in hell am
I blowing this chiseled body.
Starting today:
Get up early and exercise hard. Try sprinting down your block. Invite a friend
Treat yourself to great coffee with great friends. Don’t eat alone.
Change the music your listening to. It’s to change your mood.
Listen to something funny or inspirational
Work hard at work
Tell five people how great they look today
Flirt with someone you find attractive
If you watch TV only watch something fun. I prefer reading.
Buy some really good ice cream.
Go to bed early.
Repeat
Kick that negativity parrot off your shoulder. As soon as you catch your mind going down that path stop immediately and change your thinking.
Sending you love, Danni. Missed seeing you here but wish it was under happier circumstances. However, in other respects, seeing you come here when you’re struggling and BEFORE a relapse shows so much strength. Hang in there with us, lady. You’ve got the tools and this place is one of them. Well done using them instead of the things that will pull you down further.
I think that people like yourself are amazing…so keep on being amazingly sober!
I’m only at 5 months alcohol free, but every time I feel like entertaining the idea of “just one drink would be fine”, I think: “and then what? I stop? I start from day 1 again, hungover and go thru withdrawal? What can possibly be worth it having a drink for? Will it bring me any joy and will I be happy about it tomorrow?” The answers are no, no, no, nothing, no and no.
What a huge inspiration you are. 788 days, 18,912 hours, 1,134,720 minutes and 68,083,200 seconds. Go back to “your” beginning. For me when I feel that Gremlin whispering. I ask myself what am I afraid of, angry at, What really is causing me to want to escape. Stay strong. 24 hours at a time. And the Serenity prayer helps me get back to reality. ( And don’t drink any water after midnight. )jk
. You have the tools and you know how to use them! Just gotta dig a little deeper this time 
.
