Congratulations!
What’s this addiction counsellor thingy? Different than therapist?
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It’s a social worker helping me fight my addiction
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24 days healthy relationship with TV
603 days without gaming
I’ve just had my first vaccination, I fucking hate needles even though it never truly hurts. Thanks mom for always telling me about how horrible they are when I was young(er). Now I’ve got to wait for 15 minutes until I can leave…
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I don’t like em either. I’ll look the other way or ask them to try not to show it to me if it’s a big one. Started not liking them on my own after I turned 30, no help required 
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Thanks Chris 
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My shoulder hurts… Stupid vaccine. Probably hurts less than laying in the ICU on breathing equipment. And I imagine the lack of smell and taste sucks too 
I definitely chose the better alternative 
Now I’m hoping that I can do my job properly tomorrow as people depend on me and I don’t want to let them down.
But if I do, I won’t blame myself
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Vertel… Therapie voor scholing? Klinkt bijzonder
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Ik loop bij vnn. Daar ga ik met een maatschappelijk werker cognitieve gedragstherapie doen
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Heb ik gewerkt en “gezeten” … Ben benieuwd wat de plannen zijn maat, anders ff privé, rustâhg
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It’s been a few days since I’ve updated this thread; I’ve been on vacation 
. It only was a 2 hour drive from my house but it was fun. I went paintballing for the first time ever which I was surprisingly good at. I also went climbing on a height course. I went to a theme park. And I went to a zoo. It was fun.
I’m doing good at the moment, not pink clouding, just good
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Sounds like your having fun !! 
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Nice broeder ! Lekker er op uit !
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I almost relapsed today. My mom asked me to watch a movie with her on her Disney plus account, so I said okay. This is allowed according my opinion of moderation:
- Never alone
- Never out of own initiative
- Only movies
- Never when I’m craving TV
So she logged in on my pc. I made sure Google wouldn’t safe her password for auto-fill. We watched the movie, which was alright, I logged out. I made sure I couldn’t log in to her account and all was well.
Then the cravings hit, all of a sudden my head was attacking me with thoughts like:
- relapses can be part of recovery
- you reached a month once, you can do it again
- mom won’t be home for about an hour, so you can quickly resubscribe to Disney plus and watch an episode of Grey’s anatomy
I was sure I was going to relapse. But instead I opened the news app on my phone and read very worthless news and comments on news stories. I also washed Puk, my kitten, as she was smelly as fuck. And I got through the night without relapsing. I wish I could say I’m proud of myself, but I don’t know how that feels even if I do feel proud(autism). Puk seems to be proud though as she is all of a sudden very affectionate whilst previously very distant. I feel a mixture of serenity and joy. Not sure what it is though, might be content?
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I forgot to add, tomorrow I’ll have my first driving lesson
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I remember my first driving lesson (many moons ago) and it was very exciting. So much fun to have full control of a big machine. It was very empowering for me but then again I was young (16 years old) and didn’t have power over anything in my life. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did.
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I’ve got the feeling that my first driving lesson went shit. I was constantly accidentally speeding. I fuck up shifting gear constantly. I released the clutch way too quickly too… Which I believe are very common beginner mistakes, so all in all, it probably wasn’t that bad.
Work was terrible yesterday, I discovered that one of my favourite colleagues is racist and transphobic. And there was way too much work.
Then today I discovered that that same colleague apparently gossiped about how slow I was yesterday. Just say it to my face dammit, then I’ll try to work faster despite both my shoulders and my back hurting. And I did more then her yesterday, so she should shut the fuck up. We were talking to eachother yesterday about how our shoulders hurt. She acted as if she didn’t care about my speed. She even said to my face yesterday that I wasn’t slow. Fuck that racist transphobic gossiping bitch. I’m fucking done with most of my colleagues. I want to yell in her face about what an ass she is being, but I won’t. I’ll stick to a polite message about how she can just tell me if she doesn’t like something about my work performance.
I know I gossip myself, I hate that I do. But at least if I have an issue with someone I tell them. It’s not that hard…
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My brother just installed an Xbox one right in front of me. He turned it on, then he left with my mom for the weekend to my mom’s boyfriend without the Xbox. So I’ll be home alone with an Xbox for the weekend. He basically put an open bottle of booze or a needle in front of me. And I’m surprised by how strong I am. Sure, I’ve craved a bit, but grabbing the controller to start a game hasn’t even crossed my mind.
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I just grabbed the controller to turn the Xbox off. I had some sort of physical reaction when going through those motions, some sort of pressure on my chest(not my heart). I did not expect that.
Anyways, rather safe then sorry.
Both the power cord and controller are locked in my box for the next 48 hours. Rendering the Xbox unusable, the equivalent of flushing it down the toilet.
I know I’d have made it through the weekend without gaming, but it would hurt. We must make sure our doc is inaccessible as much as possible, this counts for all addictions, not just gaming.
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Can you put it away in a closet or a room you don’t go in? That’s very insensitive of your brother. Stay strong!!
Edit… just saw your other post. Good thinking.
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Common things, 100%. You’re still learning, it takes a little while to get the hang of it. You’re totally allowed to make those mistakes while taking lessons. Don’t sweat it.
Workplace gossip… Don’t waste your breath. She’s just a colleague right, not your boss? Her opinion about your work speed counts to absolutely zero. If you’re not on top of things, it’s your boss’ job to sort it out. You don’t need to meet your colleagues requirements.
You CAN deal with that xbox. Cover it temporarily maybe? In the end, it’s just a plastic box with bunch of wires and shit. You’re so much more than that!!
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