A minor relapse is a relapse

So, I relapsed again. I simply am not ready to give up movies. Last night I watched one and a half movie and an episode of a TV show. Really minor, but it is a relapse. I’m not getting into the whole lapse and relapse stuff, because that’s really dangerous thinking for an addict I’d say. At least for me, because if I starting seeing things as a lapse, I start to think, guess I can lapse every 2 days or so. But anyways, I’ve made a compromise with myself. No movies except marvel cinematic universe and Harry potter. And I’ve seen all of those multiple times, so I’m less likely to watch them again Still the addict brain of course, but since I lack motivation, I’m gonna have to try it another way and hopefully this works until I’m ready to give up all of tv

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Hey Jan, sorry to hear your struggling, mabe instead of just limiting yourself to those same movies, mabe give yourself like 2 or 3 movies a week? Mabe just set a routine for everyday where you get to watch 1 tv show a night and 1 movie on saturday and sunday. That way you will have something to look forward to at the end of the day and a bit of a reward on the weekend, i know youd like to cut them out completely and dabbling in your addiction can be dangerous, but i feel with technology nowadays its damn near impossible to abstain from it completely.

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I guess I could eventually time it so that I have exactly enough time before bedtime to watch an episode of a tv show and in weekends a movie. That way I’d ahve to break two boundaries, which would be more secure. But that would be in a few months, not now. I’m weak now

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Nah dont say that man, i know your strong and can do it if you put your mind to it. Just nail down that schedule and routine and i think you will be alot happier in your recovery. Just my opinion though. Of course do what works for you buddy.

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Most certainly, but I sabotage myself by not keeping it up. I don’t have a schedule for this week, nor for next week, but I’ll try to make one for next week.

Thanks for believing in me Doug :slight_smile:

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Anytime buddy, glad your gonna create a schedule for next week. Make it your goal just to get through that 1 week sticking to that schedule, and be strict with yourself about it and it will become easier. It wasnt fun for me when i decided to start working out every morning but after about a month or so it just became a normal thing, and once you start seeing the positive results from keeping a solid routine you will WANT to stick to it everyday. You dont gotta plan your entire day, start small with just planning your tv time. Hope this helps ya.

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Not yet, I’ll give him a call to arrange a moment to talk about my problems. But I think I’ll get a new sponsor, as a sponsor who is relapsing a lot more than me is probably not very healthy…

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Same here buddy :heart:

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I want to be able to love myself. I want to enjoy my life. I want to give up all recreational technology, but I seem to be unwilling to give it up. The addiction still is too strong. Nope, scrap that last sentence, my eyes are tearing up after just reading what you and doug said in later posts. That wouldn’t happen if I’d be watching tv. I wouldn’t feel that happiness. I need to keep myself accountable and share every tiny craving on TS, so that I can pull myself through the first few weeks. And after those weeks I can ride on that foundation, with caution.

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I honestly want to find help, but there’s such a long waiting line everywhere. I’m currently waiting for professional help, but I can’t get in until february 2022. So until that time, I need to get help from online sources and study ADHD and ASS myself. I hope I can apply my ASS for that, because ASS for me is really strong obsession if something interests me.

Thanks so much for saying this, it means a lot to me :blush:

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Thanks Doug, I realy appreciate that :smiley:

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I’ve been following you, haven’t had a chance to comment. Your self awareness is staggering at your period in life. I’ve been telling myself for weeks, I wanted to go to a bookstore, and buy a real book to read. It’s been years, since I got engrossed in a real Novel. In my primary school years, I would read 7-10 books a month. After completing Masters Degree, I sort lost all desire to read books. I was completely burned out on reading and writing for that matter.

Perhaps, you can make a timer, and limit your exposure to recreational technology. I mean cold Turkey may be your goal, but tapering yourself down to a desired time may be more realistic for a long time effect. Everyone is different, so different approaches or customized personal plans can have major advantages. In short, if you use a timer correctly it will or should erase guilty feelings and at the same time your meeting your personal goal. Attacking addiction with positivity in your situation would be my preference.

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I’m just glad a doctor hasn’t told me " If you keep watching TV you will die " because I’d probably be dead already. TV is very distracting , a lot more in my life can be done if I weren’t TV, so quitting TV is something I might consider.

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I highly recommend it