Today it has been 15 days since my father passed and I had to have my sweet cat, Morris, put down.
Today is also the day I received my father’s and Morris’s cremated remains. I feel thirsty like I want to hide in a 12 pack… I won’t do it but damn I feel so empty.
Stay strong, reaching out is important and I’m glad you did. You can best honor the memory of you father and your furry family member by staying sober and working through your grief. Grief is powerful, and if we numb it away it will be there waiting when we are sober again, with the added negative effects that drinking brings. I hope you can include thoughts of the joy they brought to your life in addition to feeling sad. Sending loving thoughts your way.
I’m sorry for all the hurt and sorrow you’re going through. So glad you’re staying sober and are at the site.
Aw, keep reaching out.
I can tell you that hiding in a bottle or twelve pack or anything like that, well, it just doesn’t work. All those tears and grief will wait until you’re through with numbing, and they’ll still be there to shed. Best to let the tears fall and let your grief have its voice.
Maybe there’s a song or some lyrics to write or sing or play in all of this?
Sending you strength and comfort, friend. Keep reaching out as you need to. 
Tell me about your dad’s ukulele, please. What did he like to play?
That ukelele was made by Dave of Glyph ukelele… he made some beautiful instruments. He stopped making them around 2014. My father’s was made of spalted koa wood.
He enjoyed playing George Formby songs and had fun with the ticki motif. 
I am sorry you have to go through so much loss and pain. Especially at this time of year 
But I’m glad you reached out and shared. Connection is what keeps us strong and helps us deal with the hard times in life. This community will be with you every step of the way, if you just keep on posting instead of hiding with a drink.
Sending you lots of love 
That is so sad Charles. My heart goes out to you. Your Dad and Morris look like such good ppl both. Much love. Don’t drink. Honour the love you shared. 
My deep condolences to your loss Thank you for sharing this beautiful pictures, they are lovely. Sending you hugs
They were both incredibly good
I’m sorry for your loss 
you are in my prayers 
Thank you. This app has introduced me to many kind people.
What beautiful souls. Their warmth is evident in their pictures. Sending you all of my love today. As someone who laid to rest a parent and beloved pet, I understand the hole that they open up in our hearts. Alcohol is a toxic liquid that will fill you only to sink the hole larger and farther down. Time is the only suture that can start building a bridge. To bring you back together again. I’m here if you need to reach out directly at all. 
Hi im so sorry for both your losses , your post is quite poignant as was having a talk with my mum yesterday about im only 1 bit of bad news from a relapse god forbid anything happened to my parents (both 70) or family or my cat. And she said something that helped she said she wouldnt want me to relapse if something happened to her and that she would be disappointed if i didnt face my emotions and work through it sober as drinking only delays or pushes down those emotions and then ill be back in the vicious circle of feeling bad drinking to feel better then doing it all again. Im not telling you thats what you should do just that there is a better option than that 12 pack yes it bloody hurts right now but it will get better ,ive learnt that from a miscarriage and divorce. My thoughts are with you stay strong 
ADAAT
I am all too familiar with the pain of staying sober while dealing with the loss of a father. I lost mine on July 27th this year unexpectedly. It has been a major challenge to remain sober, but I am 2 years, 3 months and some days continuing to go strong. One thing I have learned on my sober journey is that you can certainly hide your emotions behind a bottle, but it is very temporary. It just turns your mind off for a period of time. However, eventually those emotions will surface, and you will be in a much better and healthier place if you can work through those fully with a sober mind. You will thank yourself later for it because you will have been able to work through the unresolved grief issues more quickly and effectively than you would be able to if you were not sober. When you try to work through the grief while intoxicated, those thoughts become a lot of broken thoughts. Like an unfinished sentence or incomplete chapter in a book. Then you wake up and try to pick up those broken fragments and unsuccessfully try to make complete sentences out of them again. Stay strong. Your father raised you to be so.
I’ve had a few more rough moments since making this post. So much paperwork, follow up, and other business to tend to afterwards. I haven’t really had a chance to mourn.
So far I’ve had a few nasty cravings… O’douls has done a fine job of cutting off cravings.
I don’t want the 12 pack. I will be at 20 days in an hour. I guess that’s something 
I am so sorry for your loss. We lost our mother two years prior and our father had pretty well stopped caring for himself. I knew he had become weakened over time, but when he passed it was still unexpected. I guess I was in denial as to just how far he had declined.
Well done on riding out the cravings.
Your first post, and your situation right now, has had me thinking about grief and my recovery. When my own dear Dad passed away, before I got sober, I tried so hard to escape. Alcohol had “worked”, for years, to “take the edge off” things, no? (No, not really, but that’s another story).
With Dad passing, though, my grief was so sharp, the edge of it, that no amount of alcohol in the world would ever dull it.
Now, in recovery, I/we learn to “sit with my discomfort”, all kinds of uncomfortable emotions. Thinking back to grief, it is by far the worst of those emotions, at least it is for me.
But we don’t have to sit with it for hours!
Grief and cravings, both can wash over you without warning, but just take them minute by minute. They can leave as fast as they came, and you’ll have your sobriety to lean on in times of grief. You can also lean on your Dad, how proud he would be of you, in moments of craving. And Morris.
Sounds to me like you’re already doing this.
20 days is indeed something! Big hugs to you.
