And if you would like to read a little about my journey in AA, you can find it here: First AA meeting in one hour
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I think I’m likely misreading this, but I have to say your comment struck me as vaguely condescending, especially as someone who believes that I can do (and am doing) this sobriety thing under my own power. Yes, with support (and I think that might be what OP is asking about), but ultimately this doesn’t work unless I tap into my own inner power. Definitely not trying to disrespect what works for others, but I believe the solution is not outside of me because the core of the problem is not outside of me. Ultimately it is up to me to solve those problems. But hey, life may very well prove that I have no idea what I’m talking about. Lord knows it wouldn’t be the first time!
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Congrats on 18 days, that’s good shit right there. Keep it going, it’s a journey. Much respect.
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Got it. Thanks for the reply. I think it was the brevity of your initial post that struck me as being similar to an eye-rolling emoji. I don’t mean to hijack OPs thread though, so I’ll take my leave.
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Another conversation about AA and a non-religious take on higher powers and recovery in general here:
And there are lots of useful resources (programmes, podcasts, books, websites) here:
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Thank you for the additional comments and perspective.
I will share my thoughts from my life perspective as well. As with life in general, I believe there are multiple paths to success.
I would not say that I’m horrible at orchestrating my life nor has my life become unmanageable.
In a successful entrepreneur, I’m in a stable relationship with an amazing human, and have a beautiful life in nearly every way. And for these things I am fortunate and blessed. Im grateful for everything I have.
That being said, I have gotten to the point that consuming 2-4 drinks every night ‘religiously’ is not something I wish to continue.
And so I have stopped.
I have never tried to stop before but then I have never wanted to stop either.
This is a new journey for me. I don’t yet know if I will succeed on my own but I’m going to try.
My agnosticism applies really to structured religion. I do believe in a Universal or Source Energy, from which we all derive.
I believe this Universe gives be back in kind that which I project. In that sense, I suppose I believe the Universe can also heal me but in an arms-length transaction type of way.
I hope that makes sense.
I thank you again for your comments! And a thanks to everyone else too.
I’m very interested in how we are all managing this, everyone’s different journey and the alternative paths to success.
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Thank you for sharing!
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I don’t do AA and am not a religious person. I am sober almost 3 years after a drinking career of 40+ years. I don’t believe God has anything to do with me drinking or not. I do believe I am responsible for my drinking or not drinking. I am also not powerless over alcohol. I am powerful in my resolve not to drink.
There are many paths to recovery. Finding the path that truly works and resonates for you is what is important. Try AA if you want or don’t. Try SMART or Refuge Recovery or other programs or involve yourself in online programs. So many resources are available to us all.
Reading a lot on here can be very helpful as well. And congrats on your 18 days…stick with it!!
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Thank you!!! You just brought tears to my eyes…in a good way!
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This is why I get so bugged by the insinuation that it isn’t possible to do this “of your own power.” People have done it. People do it. Ultimately, though, I do think it might all come down to semantics. Tapping into your “higher power” and “digging deep” and doing it yourself may turn out to actually be pretty similar in practice.
I can’t help but think of the scene at the end of The Gray:
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I’ve taken this to be the same thing.
As long as the digging deep is not allowing the ego to get in the way.
Having an open mind and being able to admit to having no control over alcohol are far more important than whether we believe in a diety or not.
All that AA and other recovery related groups give is a structure to work with. Some need this structure to help rebuild their lives, some can do it on their own.
Whatever works, works for you.
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I guess that’s where I differ a bit. I DO feel that I have control over alcohol in the sense that I alone can choose not to drink today. I’m not powerless over it in that sense. I am more powerful than it and if I choose to drink today, that’s also on me. I’d also tend to believe that I’m more powerful than the problems in my life that led me down the road to alcohol dependency. Is it going to be easy to beat these things? Nope. Can I beat these things in isolation? Probably not, at least not at this point (and I’m not willing to try yet). But I can’t agree that I don’t have the power within me to win this battle with my demons (of which alcohol is really the least). I believe I do have power over these things, but only time will tell.
But I COMPLETELY agree with you that it is different for everyone and, like I said, I think all of this really boils down to semantics.
Just as an aside, I find it interesting that at this point Freudian psychology as a whole has been largely discarded for other concepts but we do still hang on to the ego. I’m not so sure I believe it’s a real “thing” to be guarded against. Overconfidence? Sure. Cockiness? Yup. Those are real dangers that I try to guard against every day. But a Freudian ego like a little devil voice in my mind? I’m not so sure I believe in that. But again, this probably is semantics, too.
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I had this reading today and I thought it was super relevant so i thought I’d share. Hope that’s okay 
January 20, 2020
Unity and Uniformity
“Unity is a must in Narcotics Anonymous.”
Basic Text, p. 63
Unity is not uniformity. Unity springs from the fact that we have unity of purpose-to recover, and to help others stay clean. Even so, we often find that while we strive to fulfill the same purpose, our means and methods may be radically different.
We can’t impose our ideas of unity on others or confuse unity with uniformity. In fact, a big attraction of the NA program is the absence of uniformity. Unity springs from our common purpose, not from standards imposed on the group by a few well-meaning members. A group that has the unity which springs from the loving hearts of its members allows each addict to carry the message in his or her own unique way.
In our dealings with each other in NA, we sometimes disagree rather vocally. We must remember that the details of how we get things done isn’t always important, so long as we keep our focus on the group’s primary purpose. We can watch members who vehemently disagree over trivial things pull together when a newcomer reaches out for help. Someone was there for us when we got to the rooms of NA. Now it is our turn to be there for others. We need unity to help show the newcomer that this way of life works.
Just for Today: I will strive to be a part of unity. I know that unity does not equal uniformity.
Shared via JFT App https://bit.ly/jftdownload , Copyright © 2007-2018, NA World Services, Inc. All Rights Reserved
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Replace the word “God” with “better self”, problem solved.
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Oops this was for tomorrow 
still relevant hahaha
You are, to my mind, correct in saying that we have the power over whether we drink. But this is where, to my mind, we differ. That power has also been making me drink everyday no matter how many times the night before I said that tomorrow I won’t drink. I still almost automatically drove into the garage on the way to work and bought some. To drink at work.
That to me made me powerless over alcohol.
Yes, when I came to it, it did come down to me actually having to stop myself, sometimes physically, actually picking up. But this didn’t happen untill I had admitted to myself and my wife that I had no control. I am an alcoholic, pure and simple.
Obviously the first and obvious step to take is AA as this is the most visible entity.
So I bought a Big Book. I read the Big Book, and although I don’t believe in a God, I did see so many similarities. A lot of what was being said made so much sense to me. Which is why I put so much stock in it. It’s a great resource to help us understand our disease
Below is a bit about step one, Admitting our powerlessness.
“The principle that we shall find no enduring strength until
we first admit complete defeat is the main taproot from
which our whole Society has sprung and flowered.
When first challenged to admit defeat, most of us revolted. We had approached A.A. expecting to be taught
self-confidence. Then we had been told that so far as alcohol is concerned, self-confidence was no good whatever;
in fact, it was a total liability. Our sponsors declared that
we were the victims of a mental obsession so subtly powerful that no amount of human willpower could break it.
There was, they said, no such thing as the personal conquest of this compulsion by the unaided will. Relentlessly
deepening our dilemma, our sponsors pointed out our increasing sensitivity to alcohol—an allergy, they called it.
The tyrant alcohol wielded a double-edged sword over us:
first we were smitten by an insane urge that condemned
us to go on drinking, and then by an allergy of the body
that insured we would ultimately destroy ourselves in the
process. Few indeed were those who, so assailed, had ever
won through in singlehanded combat. It was a statistical
fact that alcoholics almost never recovered on their own
resources.”
Basically, as I said abive, I found that no matter how many times I said to myself that I would not drink the next day, I still chose to carry on doing the same things over and over.
It needed a complete overhaul of my relationship with alcohol.
So yes. It was me that made that decision, but not after having a complete change of mindset, a spiritual change inside of me.
I had to change my way of thinking because I know that if I had carried on thinking in the same way, as I had already proved to myself, nothing would change
My personal program is based around this fact that if I don’t mindfully continue to grow " spiritually, keep my mind on course, I will more than likely end up back where I was, drinking, all day everyday.
This is me doing this yes, it’s me taking control, which is something that we all have the power to do, but only after a change of mindset, of spirit.
Because keeping the mindset I had before was changing nothing.
I took onboard what people in here where saying, people who were up to 2/3 years ahead of me. People who had found their path, using whatever tools they could to further their goals.
I formed my own plan.
And I didn’t argue anybody’s point. This to me stinks of ego! The only time I say anything is when people start to dismiss something that can be of use just because they feel it doesn’t fit their worldview. Again Ego.
We all find our way along the sobriety path, in our own way.
All I know is what I have done has kept me sober now for 445 days.
Which 3 years ago was something that I would never have thought possible.
My advice to new people has been and always will be:
keep an open mind!
Take what you need, leave what you don’t.
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