When you think of starting to drink again to “deal w stress”, you’re just throwing the usual and normal response at life that all alkies do.
What you do is you don’t drink and you take care of that need of “reducing”/attenting to/metabolising stress. You should go talk to someone aswell, a professional, and talk about how exactly it makes you feel that your son is going through MI. I could imagine you feel all kinda painful ways.
Take care of your own MH. So that you don’t need to shut it all down w alk again.
You can do this. But you need to do it.
Here are some resources that have helped me and others feel less alone: Resources for our recovery
My fav podcast is the mental illness happy hr. Helped me loads.