I’m only on Day Two but I came to the realisation months ago that some of my issue with drinking is my desire to ‘have something to look forward to’ or ‘have a reward for surviving bad days’. Being a full-time working mother of two kids has made me lose my idea of what I enjoy. I crave something to do after the kids are asleep, to calm me, to make me feel happy. I also crave something to help me feel less alone.
I used to read a lot and I like tv/movies but they don’t hit the spot. I need a new hobby. Any suggestions?
Honestly, I often sleep myself not long after the kids are asleep. Recently I have joined some online groups, and getting responses on those makes me feel connected.
How old are ur kids?
Mine are 7 and 12, so by the time they are asleep, I don’t feel much like starting a movie, for example. Could u start to learn something? Start a blog? What are ur interests?
Hi there! I also struggled with this. I like to crochet- YouTube has great videos that show/ walk you through everything. I also really like hot tea- I drink one called Kava Stress tea that really helps relax me. I drink it out of pretty mugs, and that helps make it feel “special”.
I also come on TS, well, I do throughout the day, but I always make a point of posting on the daily gratitude thread nightly. Sometimes I have to really think about things to be grateful for, and sometimes it’s very easy haha!
Hey Suse I struggled with this also in the beginning. Now I find I do some of these things -
Bath with candles, herbal tea and my fav music
Yoga or meditation
Study : I started a course afew months ago and absolutely love it
1000 piece puzzles
Documentaries on true crime because I love that stuff and now remember what I have watched!
Learn how to macrame
And as my sobriety has grown, I’ve come to actually enjoy my own company and feel comfortable with it - something I used to always struggle with!
Maybe these ideas help, otherwise maybe there is a hobby you used to really enjoy that you can rediscover, or, start learning about something you’ve always wanted to know more about? Or maybe some self development stuff that will help you get know the new and improving you? x
I used to feel the same way. Booze was my reward for a hard day as a Mama…until the next day, when I had to deal with the inevitable hangover and shame.
Baths with candles and music have become one of my greatest pleasures. My best friend sent me so many different kinds of really nice tea, and that ritual has replaced booze. I try to for for a long walk with an audio book or podcast when I can. I also learned to knit, and that is wonderful for quieting my mind. It took time to get used to the changes, but my evenings are so much richer and healthier now - and I actually remember them!
I am a single mom. My twins were 8 when I got sober. To fill that hole we tried to pour alcohol into, I would suggest reading books about alcoholism. Someone here might be able to point you to a helpful post or two with a list of good books.