Today marks 1 month+2 days of no alcohol
I woke up today and my first thought was: i want to drink today
I overcame the first cravings (not physical but mentally) with some breath work and housework, then had lunch… thought it was gone
In the afternoon i had some stress with selling some things online, some people came picking up my couch… cleaned the floor again… there is a soccer game outside…it was soo loud… i was literally oberwhelmed by the noises and the stress..
Then i thought: f*ck it, i am going to have some drinks. I put on my jacket, grabbed my wallet and ready to head to the store for some booze
Then i thought…really last minute: NO! youre going to be hangover and feel like crap tomorrow..way more than now. And i dont want to throw away this month
I took of the jacket and sat outside for some fresh air…
My body and mind is so exhausted now bc it cost me so much strength to stay at home and NOT buy this drinks.
This was the hardest day since my sobriety and i just wanted to share it.
Its so not worth it but damn, it can get really hard! Thank you all for listening
So happy to read your update!! Finding new ways to react to stress and life’s challenges can be hard, but the more we flex our sober muscles, the stronger they get.
It does take a lot from us, I hope you can nurture yourself and rest. You deserve that.
Sorry @Promilla1987 those days are tough. It will get easier and the irritability will get less.
BUT you did it!!! You stopped, yourself when the wheels were full motion!! Be super proud of yourself!! That was nothing small to overcome and you did it!! Keep being strong and stack those days up high in a row.
Way to power through. I feel ya. I have activities that I don’t wanna stop doing, but they nearly always involved alcohol. Grilling burgers for the family, disc golf, video games online with friends, etc. It’s tough to break the habit even though I want to. Someone else replied to you and said, “you’ll never regret not relapsing,” and I think they’re 100% correct. We wouldn’t regret staying strong, but there’s plenty to regret by giving in. One day at a time
Well i think youve done great, nobody said it was easy but it sure is worth it, everytime you resist like youve done today your resolve gets that little bit stronger, i remember being just as you described in my earlier days literally gritting my teeth and telling myself over and over that relapse just simply isnt an option, digging deep to get my head on that pillow each night sober, i can tell you that it does get easier with time, work and patience but for today which really is the only day that counts be proud i know i am of you, well done xx
It does but it takes time, us addicts are so used to the quick fix its hard work to then have to try the waiting game for things to begin to turn around, its been one of the hardest things ive learned in sobriety is patience, my advice is to be kind to yourself and accept how you feel in those moments, accept that it feels hard, that it makes you angry or upset…dont try to push it down like its not happening, accept that its there let it wash over you then try to move forward and past it but keep that faith that eventhough its hard it is worth doing, life will begin to show you little signs that things are changing as you go along…maybe an hour ticks by where drink hasnt been on your mind constantly or you find yourself genuinley laughing again at something funny, hold onto those things
Glad you stayed on your sober path. I had a day like that early in my sobriety too. Things weren’t going my way early in the day and I wanted to drink and it got brutal by night and I was one step away from leaving the house and going to get alcohol, but I called a friend in AA instead and talking through it helped so much and I got through the night. Those times are really tough, but man they really build you up and make you realize you can do it. Great job
