I think deep down we are ALL alcoholics in some way and we all dig the hole deeper and deeper with every drink we take.
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You might also find this thread helpful to read thru…
Continuing the discussion from What makes an alcoholic, an alcoholic?
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I agree. You should try it. I have had the same thoughts throughout my journey. If that thought is still in your head at all, you really don’t want to be sober. But I needed to mess up about 500 more times to reach the following conclusion: maybe I was an alcoholic maybe I wasn’t. But I do know that if I were to start drinking all my personal growth thus far as well as any personal growth I hoped for would be gone as soon as I Bagan drinking again. I wouldn’t be living under a bridge, but my life would not be all it could be. Thankfully that is reason enough for me to stay sober. I hope you find your way!
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You are definitely not the first person to feel this way. Here is what the AA book “Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions” has to say. I must concur with these paragraphs. This describes my drinking, from social to escape drinking to heavy drinker to chronic alcoholic.
…Alcoholics who still had their health, their families, their jobs, and even two cars in the garage, began to recognize their alcoholism. As this trend grew, they were joined by young people who were scarcely more than potential alcoholics. They were spared that last ten or fifteen years of literal hell the rest of us had gone through. Since Step One requires an admission that our lives have become unmanageable, how could people such as these take this Step?
It was obviously necessary to raise the bottom the rest of us had hit to the point where it would hit them. By going back in our own drinking histories, we could show that years before we realized it we were out of control, that our drinking even then was no mere habit, that it was indeed the beginning of a fatal progression. To the doubters we could say, “Perhaps you’re not an alcoholic after all. Why don’t you try some more controlled drinking, bearing in mind meanwhile what we have told you about alcoholism?” This attitude brought immediate and practical results. It was then discovered that when one alcoholic had planted in the mind of another the true nature of his malady, that person could never be the same again.
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Im not saying u are acoholic.
But i see you drink to cope with everyday life. No minimizing ur troubles.
I wonder if u are question it so u dont have to face it.
Not sure this helps but hopfefully helps u in deciding. Welcome this is a great comunity
Only you can answer “am I an alcoholic”. I feel like if you have to watch, control, monitor, apologize for the nights of too many of anything …its definitely something to look at. Alcoholism is progressive.
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