Aww Kels. I’m so sorry to read about your feelings on here. I guarantee none of us is beyond help. But you do have to want it. In my case I really wanted it bad. And I’m doing it. As I was just telling @Freckles. When you get to the point you realize your life is unmanageable drinking then maybe you will finally really want it. It’s best imo if one can do it before your life becomes totally unmanageable.
As far as believing in a God.
I been listening to the audio of the big book lately. I’m on chapter 4. It’s a great chapter about “coming to believe” in a God. I already have great faith in God. But I still thought this chapter was amazing. https://www.aa.org/pages/en_us/alcoholics-anonymous-audio-version#audio-player
Next time you’re struggling with a God have a listen if you’re willing. But mostly have an open mind if you really want to become sober.
You definitely do not always have to be like this though. That my dear is bullshit.
I sincerely hope to see you around when you’re willing. The door is always open here. Beating addiction is the toughest job anyone gets to do.
Here is some unsolicited advice for @Foreverfree36 and @Freckles read each other’s post and try beating this addiction bastard together.
What happens when you need to come back?
By the way.
I haven’t had a hangover in 471 mornings. It’s fucking awesome 