I train jiujitsu and have done for years. Really helped quitting drugs. One of the last places you want to be on a come down is a jiujitsu mat!
My team mates are all signing up for a competition in September. I competed at my previous belt and did well, but the anxiety was devastating. I’ve tried to sign up for a few comps since but always withdraw for whatever reason I convince myself sounds good.
I’m coming up to a year sober and a summer off work, a potentially dangerous combination. I know this will play on my mind if I sign up and it may get the better of me.
I suppose I’m wondering if it’s weakness to not sign up even though it will destroy my summer or sensible to not do it. Like do I let anxiety ruin this for me or am I just creating risks that don’t need to exist?
I suffer from chronic anxiety and the majority of the time my anxiety is lying to me. The times it doesn’t end up being a self fulfilling prophecy (I’m anxious about messing up, so I end up messing up because of my anxiety).
The best advice I can give you is start small. Take each step and then compare the result to what your anxiety told you. I had to build a body of evidence to show me that my anxiety lies to me.
Full disclosure I was only able to do this once I was medicated for my anxiety. I’m not saying its the be all and end all but it gave me some space to feel my emotions as seperate to myself.