Been sober for 9 months(pregnant) now I'm back at it

I’ve been sober for 9 months because I was pregnant. Knowing I can drink again hurts me. I don’t know how to drink to enjoy myself without feeling guilty.
I use any excuse to get a drink. I am also suppose to breast feed my baby but I also wanna drink and I can’t do both.
I’m relapsing bad. I need to stop. I’m beating myself up.

I am not where you are at yet but I will be at the end of the year. I hope that you stay sober because while yes we have this drive not to drink while pregnant its still applaudable because there are alot of addicted mothers who drink anyway during pregnancy.You made it 9 months and now you have the freedom to do it but that just means you can finally feel the excitment there is in staying sober because you want to not because you need to.
I got sober for 108 days last year relapsed off and on for a month and then had 17 days before I found out I was pregnant.In those 17 days I was finally feeling free and loving sobriety.Its never worth the drinking.
We are here for you.Take it one day at a time.


I hear ya! I was pregnant for 18mo out of the last 3 years. I really looked forward to drinking after pregnancy. I really thought I would drink less than I did before I was pregnant. I quickly returned to old habits. My youngest is 6 mo old and I have struggled since she was born. I’m with ya.

Thanks ladies, I feel like I’m struggling all alone. I feel ashamed of myself and my thoughts of drinking. I feel like I’m cheating on my boyfriend with another man. Except I’m not. Its just drinking.
I feel like a huge disappointment. I drank 5 tall cans yesterday and the day before. I have drank every single day this week. I feel like I’m enabled I have no one telling me no. I need to be told no. I need to feel that shame.

You’re right. I shouldn’t be hurting myself by thinking that way, and I have started meditation and this app "headspace"
I have started getting into drawing and writing again. I have to do this for my kids. My kids are the reason I need to stop. Then there’s a rhcp concert next month and its my first night out. I don’t even know about going because its a huge let go and I can get drunk. Should I be allowed to have fun and get drunk? Ughhhh

I went to a party one time with my husband when my kids were little, my youngest 4 or 5 months old. I probably had 4 drinks throughout the night but since I hadn’t drank in over a year from having a baby, I felt a little hungover the next day. My breastmilk supply was low for two days! I was so frustrated and had to nurse/pump every 2 hours to get my supply back up. It was like having a newborn all over again! After that, I didn’t drink the remainder of nursing. Something to keep in mind from a fellow mommy that alcohol will lower your milk supply and I remember how frustrating that was for me.
Don’t beat yourself up too bad. Congratulations on your new little one and stay strong! You can do it! You sound like a wonderful mom who loves her kids to the moon and back… that kind of mom deserves to be kind to herself and take things one day at a time. :slight_smile:

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Thanks :two_hearts::dizzy: I appreciate it.

You are not alone! My son is about to turn 1 year and I went through the same thing. Sober through pregnancy and breastfeeding (5 months). Then very quickly I went back to drinking every night and in excess. Sobriety is always hard at first but it’s so worth it. A large part of my motivation is to be truly present and set a better example for my son. You CAN do this. This forum is an excellent resource filled with empathetic people. Take it one day at a time…it does get easier as time goes by.

I gave in last night to a tall can but today’s the day I take charge and get in control of my life. Not going to let the alcohol control me anymore.
Im excited for this. For myself

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Good luck, keep checking in, i find this forum (and others alike) very helpful to keep my mindset in order :slight_smile:

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I kept myself busy today and got out the house. Day one is the worst. But I’m gonna keep it up :clap: