Hi everyone I’m new on here. At this point I’m looking for any kinda way to express myself or just to read and see that other people are going through the exact same problems I have with alcohol. Alcohol is probably my best and worst friend, my first true love that is always there for me but turns its back on me more times then I can count. I’m only 2 days sober now but I think I’m going to really try it this time and believe in myself. 2 nights ago I drank until I was in a blackout state and then went into full rage mode out of nowhere and tried to fight my best friends in a hotel room, after getting kicked out and trying to sneak back in more then once I was left outside in the freezing cold streets of a town I knew nothing about. I constantly blamed them the whole night with threating text messages and claiming they betrayed me. The way I felt yesterday morning I never want to feel again. I lost some of my best friends and now have to live with the guilt I have for life. All I want is to be a fun guy and have people enjoy having me around but that has slowly changed throughout this year and now I’m at rock bottom. Reading everyone’s stories on here helps me more then anything in this time . I am no longer working right now and trying to balance being a single father. All I want is forgiveness but I want to prove that I deserve a second chance.
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The only person you have to prove yourself to, is yourself. Actions speaks more…
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Welcome! I am Sandra. First off, never say I am JUST 2 days sober. Each day is work you put in to stay sober. Congratulations on 2 days of sobriety. You are on the right track.
I have been in a black out state more than less times. I am not proud of some of the things I have done or people I have hurt. I have put that on the back burner for now because I need to save my life through sobriety so someday I can visit that bridge when I come to it.
Have you checked out AA speakers on YouTube? If not, I highly recommend it. We are here to support you in any way we can.
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