Hello! My brother checked himself in to rehab on Friday and I was very triggered to drink. I started binging on alcohol and blacking out in college when we went to parties together because I couldn’t deal with the anxiety of seeing him wasted. The impotence of not being able to lift him up when he was wasted in a couch. The fact that he’s going to rehab is great because this is the first time he admits he has a problem and that he needs help to overcome it. I’m very hopeful of his recovery and scared at the same time because I don’t want to get my hopes up (rehab is not a miracle worker and it takes time and work that he seems willing to do). I’m very anxious about this development and I’ve been wanting to drink to calm down and to run away from the situation. It has been a struggle and it continues to be a struggle because my brother was one of my triggers to getting trashed.
Im very happy to be sober and not drinking over the holidays was actually an easy feat. During Christmas my brother was drinking and was mocking me for not drinking and I did not doubt my sobriety for a second. I’m not sure if it’s the anxiety pushing me to drink right now or the fact that my brother is a trigger or both. I’m hoping to understand why I’m triggered because he has a few months in the rehab facility and I hate having this anxiety and do not want to sabotage my sobriety. Let me know if you have any advice to deal with this 
My closest friend just went back to rehab, to say it didn’t hurt and give me anxiety would be a terrible lie, it did,
But I saw how disappointed he was and remorseful it encouraged me to not want to go down the road again.
Bellece it or not seeing people in rehab or on day one, reminds me of what its like and what i dont want to be doing
1 Like