@MommaHope Apology is not necessary. The shock of being laid off would be enough to push any newbie off the wagon. Now to get back onto the wagon and stay there for today. Getting and staying sober will make all of this look differently. The important thing is to keep busy. Maybe you can start by updating your resume and getting it out there on the job boards. Maybe hook up with a headhunter. I can’t believe a hospital would lay off any worker during all of this so I’d say your chances for getting a job are pretty good.
Have you read the AA Big Book? If not, please do. It makes all of this confusion make sense. I love the stories. I see myself in so many of them. Maybe you will see you in those pages as well.
If you would like to just chat we could do that too. Hang in there. We are all learning how to live with this disease.