Day 16 pretty much done. Feeling positive and calm. Hope you are all doing well sober fam
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Thanks for the update, pal, how are you feeling? We are all here for you. Your journey is miraculous. 
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I hate that feeling. Take lots of deep breaths.
Day 1 again… ugh why do I do this.
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Day 52 
weird day, but Grateful to be Sober !
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On holiday with the family since last friday it’s been turbulent and I mean turbulent! Been a huge bust up yesterday and 2 have left one dropped out before we even came. This is what you get with family’s I know that and also these are the in-laws and are full of many problems I have so much patience but I got very mad last night. When someone tried to blame my wife for the reason they were leaving and it was so out of order I went mad. My emotions were all over and I felt like crying at one point but didn’t but I did pop but not really bad I just said how it was,told the truth that people don’t want to see and that was that. All I wanted to do after was leave the caravan and go to the parks club bar and drink it’s the most iv wanted to since stopping 267 days ago I didn’t tho I sat with my emotions I stayed in the caravan and calmed down I learned to cope with how I felt and not run from it. I talked about It to my wife and I messaged my best friend later and today I told my mum about what happend. I felt better about it all and later made it better when we all calmly talked about what had happend as it was a big elephant in the the room all day.
Over all I’m very pleased with myself and what I was able to achieve and cope with all with a sober head and embracing all emotions good and bad because hey that’s life it happens people argue people love eachother things get better don’t run from it you will be shocked what you can achieve. Peace out people 
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Glad you’re back Ryan. I think everyone here knows what it’s like to have ‘another day one’. I hope this time it sticks for you
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Day 40. The longest i have ever been. Best 40 days ever!
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Best of luck Chef!
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Oui Chef, thankyou! 
But you came back, and that’s something.
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Day 151. Things are good. Stay strong, stay sober all!
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Hi Ryan, to answer your question.
You haven’t yet accepted your situation? If you accept that you are powerless over alcohol, and say no to that voice and don’t pick up the drink. Life will get easier.
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- All is good. Awesomely blessed.
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Hey buddy, just wanted to let you know that I’m thinkin bout you over here. Your unflinching acceptance of reality is incredibly inspirational too say. You are fantastic. Sending you love.
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Enjoy your well deserved holidays 
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- It was cold in my bedroom! That’s some time ago. Makes for nice sleeping, too bad that came to an end abruptly. Just for today I go to work, I’m off for 3 after. Probably won’t make it to a meeting. How fast I’ve gotten into that. I’ll make it without today. I love to be clean & sober. Have a great sober day all! Love from Amsterdam.
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2 day:
Today my real estate agent comes over to take pictures of my house so we can finally sell it.
Later the the day I have a job interview.
Trying to keep bussy and not focussing to much on my addiction.
Have a nice day to all if you! 
“Let your bad days creat better tomorrow’s”
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One month…it wasn’t as hard as the last couple of tries and it went by rather quickly. The little voice started whispering to me “why are you doing this?” “Do you really think you can forever go on with out alcohol?” “you’re missing out” “you can control it” haha that is my favorite one, ohhh how I try to lie to myself. I have a big event coming up in one month, my 2 month sobriety date. A music festival I’ve been going to for 11 years now. I want this one to be alochol free. I want to remember the entire weekend, and bands I saw, people I meet. But there is that FOMO again, and can I really tolerate to be around all these people, will I relax and enjoy it…sober!?! The good thing is we didn’t get a our free passes to the Miller Lite stage which was free drinks all weekend long…I will miss the bigger better port-a-potty tho. 
Like I said it is a month away, but I’m already stressing about it. I think I can do it…it’s not only the music fest. I’m starting to feel grief for quitting. Its so absurd when all the poison did was cause me grief. I have a lot of “imposter syndrome” going on also. Hmmmm, idk
Maybe after I hit this reply button I will feel silly for saying all of this and feel differently. 
anyway, keep on going to all this struggling. And good job to everyone. One month, one day start tomorrow.
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