I get that, alcohol was my everything. I’m still at the point where I have to for go some very basic pleasures because they are associated with alcohol. Simple things like watching football or boxing or the xbox or poker, I think it was more a case of what shall I do while I drink than the other way round.
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I downloaded a sample on my phone. I think I’m going to buy it for myself. Thanks for the suggestion.
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329.51
Guess who just signed up for an intensive outpatient program. 
#Thisguuuuuuuy
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Checking in on day 96 today. First day back at work in months and it felt good!
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Congrats and keep on going. We’re here with you on this journey.
Day 323. Less anxiety today, but I’ve been feeling lonely and depressed, and dealing with pain from the past. Today was dark for a while, but I’m doing a bit better now, just doing my best to stay grounded and connected. At any rate, another sober day. Good things keep happening when I keep stacking those up.
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…and kitty cats playing in the background. Love!
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Checking in 19…
Life is definitely not stable but it’s definitely not chaotic. A happy medium for a addict that’s used to life feeling like the tumble cycle on a dryer. I’m working ab that is bringing a reassuring feeling sometimes better than any meeting. At least in the financial strains I am in right now that’s how it’s feeling. I know that’s temporary with continued work and I’ll be grateful when it does go away but for now everyday I’m waking up working a little less stress is in my life even if I’m completely unhappy in my jobs overall representation of my capabilities. I know I’m better than this but I know I’m getting things put together, slowly but I think that’s a change for the better for this guy! I’m used to fast and heavy with Inconsistency somewhere, somehow bc I never knew differently. I knew normal was being consistently inconsistent and it’s hard habit I formed to break. It has migrated to every aspect of my life. It’s a toxic trait learned from my family that it appeared I was happily ready to pass it on myself and 32 years is not old old lol but being consistently inconsistent for 32 years will take a period of time to retool this mind to think differently in this area. Just for today tho I spent time thinking about it, actually attempting to trick this trickester and it only happens one day at a time…
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Checking in at Day 84 today. Very happy to have lived the last 84 days sober! As the days go by, I feel so much more determination and dedication to my sobriety 
it’s amazing how much I am learning about myself and the things I CAN do without needing alcohol. I used to drink to give me courage and confidence in social situations, but now I realise it was actually what took away my courage and confidence! I was drowning out my true self, the woman who is capable and competent and fun to be around! I feel brave these days, …and vulnerable but able to accept my vulnerability and use it to grow 
the universe loves me, as it does all beings! what a beautiful truth 
have an awesome sober day everyone, I’m grateful to be here and able to share this with you 
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Beautiful!!
When I was there it was raining. Looks like you have gorgeous weather.
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My Monday,
Dry cleaners, work, bike, dinner (leftovers), water yard and flowers, more work, bed, repeat; but all done stone cold sober!!!
Day 10 done
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Checking in day 109 work was good 200$ in the bank for today let’s get it!
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Day 23. Dragged myself out of bed today! Been there for 3 days. I knew I needed to make myself get up. I didnt go to work but I did clean up around the house, do laundry, dishes, etc. It took all the energy I had but it felt great to get it done.
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Thanks @anon12657779! And yes it is a learning process @Desire2ChangeToday, going through the changes of finding yourself again without the assistance of alcohol. It’s like I stop and think, oh yeah I am funny or hey I can do that without alcohol. At least I think I’m funny. Lol. Movies alone sounds like a good time to me! Keep up the progress 
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Checking in on day 6. Wishing everyone a beautiful Tuesday 
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End of day 346 (start of 347). Just home after my first sober concert. It was kind of bittersweet. I was reminded at how awful drunk people are when I and my friend were groped by some guy who kept going past us, putting a hand on a shoulder and then doing a long slide across the back. My friend snapped and loudly and firmly said “don’t touch me!” Drunk guy lost it and started to get aggressive and I stepped in between them. He started pointing and angrily shouting “they are fucking lesbians!” whilst his friends had to pull him away. Eventually he left, blaming us for ruining the concert for him. He was waiting outside when we left, so we dodged off to the side and walked to a single car together to drop each other off at cars so no one had to walk alone. Alcohol and toxic masculinity and homophobia are terrible combinations.
Otherwise, the concert was good and I am glad I was sober. Although the experience rattled us and it makes me feel very sad that it sometimes feels unsafe out there in the world, I have a framework in my mind to practise holding him with compassion and knowledge that he is sick. It is hard AF to do. But I will try.
Otherwise, life has been great and busy. I am behind on the check-ins so will try to catch up to what everyone has been up to tomorrow. For now, I sleep as it’s 1am. Thanks for reading my vent. 
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Ahh that’s a shame, it sucks when one person’s actions ruins the vibe, potentially for the evening. I’ve had a similar experience before, sucks the joy out of the evening.
But above all, I’m glad you’re ok!
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That’s great. I sincerely hope it shows the courts what we already know - how committed you are to your sobriety and how hard you’re working to make a better life 
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