And you know what: i dont miss it at all anymore!!
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Day 42 here. I am still early in recovery. But what do you doooooo to keep fighting? Every day I wake up happy to realize I stayed sober the previous day and do not have a hangover. But buy the time the day ends I feel beat-up. Today I am wondering how long it will feel like a fight. Does it get easier? Maybe part of it is I would drink to escape responsibilities and stress…and now theres a lot of responsibilities and stress.
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Hang in there. It will get much easier. For me it was after 2 or 3 months
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Thank you love! 
I want this more than I want to get drunk.
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A bit tired, so an early dinner at Melfi’s. It is a swanky place I’ve never been to. Eating at the pizza bar since a reservation for one is impossible. Will post pizza photo separately.
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I googled the menu. (I love checking out menus). The “White Pie” sounds yum!
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Day 48 let’s GO!!
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This looks like an awesome place
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I hope this message finds you well.
Stay strong my friend
That’s the beauty of working a program. I won’t have to turn to drugs and alcohol at the first sign of trouble, or ‘weakness’ as most people seem to be calling it these days, though I’m not a fan of the term. When shit hits the fan, I have hundreds of options and none of them are drinking or drugging
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Ok…here it is:
Sweet sweet tomatoes
Cheese is amazing
Sausage is mid to spicy (yum)
Crust is perfect
Broccoli rabe (how can you go wrong)
The flavors meld together perfectly!!!
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Sorry, I keep posting to fight the urge to order a drink. The final course is winderful espresso and amazing vanilla gelato cannoli. Boom! There is not an open table in here now.
Day 15
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Checking in day 2 complete.
My life could not be in more disarray and more easily excusable to get loaded right now but I just try and remember what’s the fucking point. Will it change the hurt i feel? No. Will it change the loneliness? No. Will it fix the mess I have made for myself? No. It will simply make time extend. I will have hurt something or someone like always when the high dissipates and I will have again done what everyone always expects me to do that knows me. I don’t want to get high anymore. I don’t want to be the man that destroys everything around me and I don’t want to destroy everything about me. While I crave for the escape heroin brings right now I know deep down it’s only for a moment in time and when that moment passes and the darkness turns to light my heart will feel every ounce of pain from before only now magnified bc I again failed myself…
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I have a new found respect for programs.
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You’re doing great!!! Good job
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And that’s assuming you make it out alive. Heroine is a deadly drug that steals souls from our plane on daily basis. Stay strong friend.
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I’m starting to lose the ability to count on my hands how many people I know in the area I am living who have passed from heroin addiction. It’s a fucked disease and one that your absolutely right only takes one more time to be the last time. That almost happened to me, Thursday night I OD since I hadn’t used for awhile and ended up taking way to much. It scared me bad, and what’s fucked up about the drug is no matter how scary it is. You still crave it 
like nothing ever happened… Heroin steals your soul 
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Just focus on today. Go to NA meetings for support. Have you gone into a detox center?
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Thank you for this!!! Love it!!
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